Anyway, welcome to today's no-angst installation of everyone's favorite journal!
I'm still playing Warcraft II, although I've finished the human campaign. Yes, it's one of those games, where, after playing the noble human war leader freeing his home-land from the domination of the orcish hordes, you can then play the cruel and heartless orcish war leader and conquer the world, slaughtering the puny humans as you go.
It's an amusing little game, far behind the ancient glory that is Myth II, but the various units have character, so to speak. Sure, Myth II had the surly dwarven grenadiers (who went into battle hurling bombs at the enemy, and muttering "Make up your mind!" or "Oh, all right..." when you gave them orders, unless that order involved blowing things up, in which case they chuckled "Heh, heh, heh... BURN!"). Ah, the dwarven grenadiers, who all by themselves teach you about the perils of friendly fire.
In Warcraft, as in Myth, all the units have their own replies when you command them, although this becomes horrendously boring when dealing with the common scrub units, who simply say "Yes, sire!" or, alternately "Hullo." But you also have the knights, who sound like they're constipated all the way up to the backs of their necks as they state "For the king!" while obeying your commands to wander about. Or the mages. When you recruit a new mage, he shows up with an exasperated cry of "Who summoned me?!" and is surly for the rest of the game. While the other units sound positively eager to serve to cause of justice, the mage grumbles "Your *request*?" or "What *is* it?" when you dare interrupt him to give orders. And "*sigh*, Very well," upon obeying.
Plus, you can't disrespect a game too much when it's got spells that'll turn your opponent's units into sheep. Baa.
The orcs are just as amusing, with their grunts and surl, and their panicked exclamations whenever someone attacks "They're *burning* our *city*!" comes the petulant wail, or perhaps "We're under *attack*!" Their naval units pretend to be pirates, with a sort of confused "Arrr?" when you tell them to do something, or, inexplicably, a cheery "I would *love* to!" Weird little blighters.
While it's entertaining, it's not as desperately challenging as Myth was, where I'd actually have to play several times to complete a level. Sure, some scenarios in Warcraft might involve my forces being hurled back, defeated and bloody, from the enemy fortifications, but I can always then retreat and train new grunts to serve the cause of justice. Or evil, depending.
This weekend, I suspect I will partake of the glorious wretchedness that is Supernova, assuming it hasn't been flushed out of theatres already. Supernova has all the marks of being a really wretchedly bad movie. Hey, it's a rescue ship in space! Hey, there's flirting! Hey, there's some alien artifact! Hey, there's a sun exploding! Hey, there's... WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?!
And now, it's today's MP3 feature. Check out The Naked Flames' Superhero (Stuck In a Secret Identity). Unless you're one of those non-geeky readers. In which case, um, well, life's just rough, I guess.
And, lastly, we have a bonus comic book review, for "Soul Saga #1", which really ought to be avoided. Really, it's one of those things where the writer has slapped together tons of disparate elements in the hope that it will result in a workable world. You've got giant, anti-gravity, flying warships. You've got guns. But, inexplicably, everyone wears armor and weilds swords. Except for the surly love interest princess, who wears a battle bikini and carries a gun. This is just... plain bad... It's a fist-full of cliches, as we get the "Ancient Artifact Power Blade Is Destined To Find Its Way To The Hero", the "Woman Wearing More Than A Bikini? She's So Dead" thing (the hero's sister, who, since she clearly can't be the hero's love interest, gets to wear armor that will protect her from blows aimed at somewhere other than her nipples and crotch, and promptly appears to die about half-way through), the "Well, This Mission Involves Royalty, Diplomacy, and Travelling Through Enemy Territory, so we're going to send a single, wimpy, unescorted destroyer and a bunch of scrubs. Oh, and the hero. Have fun!" It's a book who's height of dialog is reached between the princess and the hero, during their escape from the inevitable attack on the single, wimpy, unescorted destroyer ("I--I'm on fire!" "Your highness, I really don't think this is a good..." "Not me, you idiot! My cape!")
Where's Han Solo to mutter "No reward is worth this..." when you need him?
The only original thing this one had going for it is the advisor to the Evil Overlord (of course there's an Evil Overlord. Duh.) who notices someone who is destined to gain enough power to defeat the EO. For once, we don't get "It is his destiny to destroy you!" but "Hm. He's going to get pretty powerful. Frankly, sir, I say kill him now." It'll come out the same in the end, but I'm pretty darn tired of all that prophecy crapola.
What was I talking about? Oh. "Surly Bastard Comics Reviews - Buying The Crap Comics, So You Don't Have To".
Rant 'o the day contains no additives, preservatives or alien spores of any kind. Use only as directed. Do not expose to direct sunlight. Do not fold, spindle, multilate or remove identifying tags. Handle with care. Contains less than 3% milk fat by weight, not by volume. Certified 'Syndicate Approved'. Squeeze the lemon. Remember, kids, only users lose drugs.
THIS SPACE FOR RENT