Firstly, we've got a new, nummy, espresso machine at work. It's not a very GOOD espresso machine, mind you, in that the little milk frother is rather inconveniently positioned, and the thing seems to have an evil mind of its own, occasionally belching up a bit of steam when it shouldn't. But still, what can you do? It's espresso! Mmm! Espresso...
Next, I got some reading in this weekend (the fact that I can reliably conquer the Emperor difficulty level in Civ has led to me being satisfied enough not to have to play it all the time. Soon, I'll move up to Diety, and then my invincibility will be complete!). Specifically, I absorbed the book The Man In The High Tower by Philip K. Dick. I think. I may have forgotten the author's name. But, anyway, I know I got the title right. I've had it for ages (among a pile of other books) but I hadn't read it yet.
It's one of those neat-o alternate history books, which you really can't get enough of. Specifically, it's one where the Evil Empire of the Axis manages to triumph in World War Two. And it's done right, too, since really the only way for the Axis to win would be for America to be incompetant and not get involved, which is precisely what happens, as the assassination of Roosevelt succeeds and America isn't properly hauled out of the Depression. Instead of being a war story, it's really about the question, 'Okay, so the Evil Empire won. What NOW?'.
Well, what happens of course is that the Frankenstein's Monster of the Axis Alliance starts to quietly come apart, with Italy cheerfully going off on their own lunacies, while the Nazis tear themselves a vast, hollow space to play in, and the Japanese try to choke down all this new territory (including the west coast of the US, which they seem to have gotten by default). And everyone waits for the inevitable outbreak of World War III and the almost certain nuclear annihilation of large chunks of civilization.
Lots of subplots, focus on characters as well as the broad sweep of alternate history, et cetera. What more can you ask for? Well, an ending that didn't imply that this might just be a figment of someone's deranged imagination, for one. Are authors these days incapable of writing good endings? Scoff, scoff. Oh. Wait. That might have been a spoiler. Um... guano. Oh well.
Lastly, in the Amusing News department, there's a vigorous tale going about that Congressional aides have engaged in a vigorous spam-fest, self-immiolating their own mail servers in a giant flame-war started by a single weight-loss pill spam sent by someone's aide. You can't BUY entertainment like this. It's good to know that their idiots, who apparently can't figure out that when they hit 'Reply To All' on a message that went to fifty bazillion people, it really will send your reply to every bloody one of them, are just as dumb as the normal office idiots, who do the exact same thing, only not at the public's expense.
Ah. Comedy.
I forgot the title for this episode, so we'll just call it "The Savage Beating Of Vegeta".
Vegeta spends a few minutes mulling over his scuffle with Frieza, trying to figure out what went wrong. Well, what went wrong is Frieza was too durn fast. Frieza taunts Vegeta a bit about his wimpiness, and the enraged and desperate Saiyan finally simply cuts loose with the ol' energy blasts, which Frieza dodges, shattering bits of terrain. As Frieza continues to dodge, Vegeta simply fires a hail of blasts, lighting up the sky with a massive explosion field that may or may not have been stolen from Macross.
Piccolo, Krillan and Gohan flee to a safe distance. Like a mile or ten.
Frieza continues dodging as Vegeta expends his energy on this futile but impressive attack. Finally, enraged by the continued taunts of the villain, Vegeta flies way up, firing off his most powerful attack, despite his erstwhile allies yelling that he'll kill everyone if it hits.
Frieza looks momentarily surprised, then simply punts the thing back at Vegeta, who only barely gets out of the way. Everyone covers their eyes as the blast goes off, lighting the sky like a second sun.
Unfortunately, that cost the last of Vegeta's energy, and Frieza now takes the opportunity to begin pounding the snot out of him, smacking Vegeta into the sea below. Gohan moves to help, but the pragmatic Piccolo stops him.
In the Next Dimension, King Ki panics as he realizes Vegeta is certainly doomed, and with him, their hope of defeating Frieza. Hey! What about Goku?
Frieza, meanwhile, makes like Moses and parts the ocean's water so he can float down and whup up on Vegeta some more without getting all wet. Eventually, he kicks Vegeta up onto dry land again, in front of the three Johnny Bench impersonators, so they can watch.
More beating on Vegeta follows, while the three heroes are too paralyzed with fear to help their ally. Now, if this were a western show, this would be counted against them, but here there's nothing wrong with taking a moment to think, 'Man, what am I doing, this guy could KILL me!'.
Meanwhile, the healing tank goes 'ping' and Goku is at last made well. And he celebrates by blowing apart the healing tank and drifting up out of the ship. Um... not big on brains, there, is he, our Goku. The medical bay is IMPORTANT, there, guy.
Goku spends some time considering how powerful he feels, now, and doesn't appear to be in any hurry to, oh, haul his lazy butt over to the fight and save his friends, although he does spend some time commentiong about how he will.
Next time: Vegeta snuffs it, but can Goku make it in time to keep his friends (and son) from joining the Saiyan prince in the Next Dimension?
As a side note, the whole 'Vegeta' thing is, indeed, a vegetable joke. 'Saiyan', or 'Saiyajin' is a transliteration that means, essentially, vegetables. All the Saiyans' names are vegetable jokes, too. Goku's Saiyan name is Kakarrotto (Carrot), plus there's Nappa (or 'Cabbage'), Raditz ('Radish') and Vegeta himself, who is, of course, the Prince of the Vegetable People.
No, really.
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