Blue Light Productions presents

                    Kid Mysticism & The Net.Titans
                         "A Lurker's Journey"
                            By Ben Rawluk


Cover: A Picture of Lurker Lad facing off against a number of different 
LNHers, who seem...distorted some how.

Lurker Lad stood just off of the center of the Transmat Room, surrounded 
by the usual Intricate Machinery. Dr.Stomper, with back turned to LL, 
stood nearby, poring over some dials and buttons and screens. "Alright, 
Lurker Lad. I've attuned the Transmat to the Unusual Looni.Sig I 
detected." Dr.Stomper muttered, and then looked up. "It's good of you to 
help with this. If you'd step into the Transmat?" 

Lurker Lad nodded. "My pleasure." he said, and then got into the small 
chamber. Dr.Stomper activated the Transmat, and away Lurker Lad went.

_Neither Here, Nor There_

"Did anything happen?" a familiar voice mumbled, as Lurker Lad got out of 
the Transmat. 

"No, Dr.Stomper. Nothing. I guess the Transmat malfunctioned. I think I 
stayed here...even though it felt like I had transmatted." Lurker Lad 
answered, and then glanced at the source of the other voice, his eyes 

"Dr.Stomper? Who's that? It's me, Dr.Chomper, and..." Dr.Chomper's voice 
trailed off. "Who are you? You only look kind of like Loser Lad." 

"Um...I'm...Lurker Lad..." Lurker Lad mumbled. "But...I guess I did 

Lurker Lad stumbled off, out of this other Transmat Chamber. Seconds 
after he left, Dr.Chomper chomped down on a Burger. He was a heck of a 
lot heavier than Stomper. Suddenly, a rather large alien-type came 
crashing through the wall.

_The LNHHQ Main Corridor_

"I...I must have transmatted onto another Net.Earth!" Lurker Lad 
muttered, and he nearly bumbled into someone. He looked up, to see an 
unusually dressed woman before him. "Oof! I'm sorry." 

"Oh...It's ok! Do I know you? It's so hard to tell these days.." The 
woman said. "I'm Designer Lass..." 

Lurker Lad nodded, and waved. He continued down the hall, and muttered, 
"She must be New Look Lass's counterpart." 

"Hey! You!" Lurker Lad looked up at the voice. "What are you doing 
wandering the halls?! We need all the help we can get with these 
"Scenes of Revengence"!" The voice was...a Cyborb Ultimate Ninja?!

"Who are you?!" Lurker Lad asked, startled.

"Cyber Ninja, who else? Now get going, and remember not to stick to your 
usual opponents. The Idea is to confuse them and get the killing edge for 
once!" Cyber Ninja called out, and ran off. 

A moment later, Spam-Eater Lad and Parking Ticket Kid came running down 
the hall, chasing Dr.Monotone and Valley Girl. 

"What a _weird_ Looniverse...!" Lurker Lad muttered. 

"Loser Lad? Is that you? Did Designer Lass get you a new costume?" Lurker 
Lad turned around. 

"Who are you?" 

"Oh...I guess you aren't Loser Lad. I'm Kid Musician..." The net.hero 
said, "And this is Harpfire.."


Lurker Lad muttered, "Kid Mysticism & Spellfire's counterparts!" then he 
spoke up. "Um...who is Loser Lad, what're his powers?" 

"Loser Lad? He's this annoying Net.Tightman who can shut up and always 
posts these annoying comments. He always announces his position to 
everyone." Kid Musicism commented, and then he and Harpfire flew off. 

Lurker Lad looked up, as suddenly the air was filled with a long, loud 
humming sound. Using his Flight-Ring.Thingee, and flew up, followed by 
the Other Net.Heroes to the Top of see Alt.Lactus building 
some Weapon or other onto the building. 

"NO!" Lurker Lad yelled. 

Alt.Lactus looked down on mortals. "This Varient of the Looniverse 
Alt.Comics.LNH has played out, and was never meant to be anything more 
than a dead newsgroup." He plucked Lurker Lad and held him at eye-level. 
"You are not of this newsgroup. I am removing you from this reality back 
to your own." Suddenly, Lurker Lad vanished, and Loser Lad appeared in 
his place.

Alt.Lactus powered up the Weapon, and surging energies lanced out into 
the Net.Earth. In seconds, This Looniverse was lapped up in the form of 
Net.Elemental forces, absorbed into Alt.Lactus. All that remained was a 
cool, dark husk, with only a single being on it. Alt.Lactus finally 
addressed this being, as he cleaned his mouth, and used a toothpick. "You 
were foolish to try and populate this Newsgroup.

"Just writing about my Characters." The OmniDimensional Green Author Guy 

"Yes, well, consider writing time OVER. Forever." Alt.Lactus said, and 
vanished in a burst of cos.mic energy.

Moments later, the Newsgroup was full of the same insanity, and the ODGA 
Guy grinned. 

_The "Real" Looniverse_

Lurker Lad awoke in the real transmat chamber, and slowly got out. Before 
him was Dr.Stomper. "You ok? There was a weirdo called Loser Lad running 
around a few minutes ago, but then vanished."

"I'm fine." Lurker Lad laughed, and walked out.


Next Issue: Linguist Lass, against the World!



Lurker Lad is public domain, but reserved.
Dr.Stomper is a public-domainer.
Alt.Lactus is a public domain character.

Dr.Chomper, Designer Lass, Cyber Ninja, Spam-Eater Lad, Parking Ticket 
Kid, Dr.Monotone, Valley Girl, Kid Musician, Harpfire, Loser Lad, & 
OmniDimensional Green Author Guy are owned by me.

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