NightSummer had already begun. I didn't realize it tho. Lying on a cold floor, nude under my quilt, scared, longing for drugs and being too drained to make them, distracted me. Clarissa lay in the other room dying, but not this time by my hand. I hoped she would die. Not because I feel guilty about killing her that time, and I do, but because she'd threatened to kill me.
I decided then and there to send that encrypted file to everyone. Blow the lid off the whole thing. Might as well be useful...... I was too late though. NightSummer had already begun. I just wanted to sleep. I'd started to slide there when I felt Thalion kneel down next to me to peer into my face. Something about Madoc having a dead twin he wanted to talk to. What would it take? The death of an Amberite or Shroudling; thinking like a Shroudling Thalion had started me off on people instead of animals. It gets harder and harder everytime. I thought about how much Teridias owes me, but it hadn't the taste I thought it would.
I didn't tell Thalion that it would probably kill me to do another connection. Which would be a huge waste: I was neither Amberite nor Shroudling and I was the only one I knew about who could DeadNet. I could sleep if I were dead...... but I knew that wasn't true; and it hurts so much to die!
It came to me! It was perfect! 1 person could be raised from the dead at NightSummer. Clarissa was dying. Why not let me kill her again? Madoc could speak to his twin and Clarissa could be raised..... Thalion seriously considered it before going back into the other room. I don't think anyone else liked the idea, it wasn't followed up on. And I was alone again with the taste of fear at the back of my mouth.
Samara came in and we talked about the nanites. And about the Azi Rebellion and the fact that we both thought Ghostwheel was behind the recent deaths. For different reasons. Samara actually had some nanites with her! She told me all about them; what they were, how they work, how to program them.
They're programmed by focasing through gem stones - opals were the best. Corleu had some opals. Who better to be a programmer than an Azi such as me? Ah! Understanding: what Dara did could only have been done to non-Azi. We have built in security systems that prevent this kind of contagion. I offered to program them and managed to morph a couple opals........ but they had Samara do it. Before we parted Samara gave me some nanites in a vial.
Clarissa was put into stasis using the nanites, but it wasn't going to be enough. If I could do opals I could make a machine. Maybe. Maybe an entire lab? I thought about what I know about Paradigm: it's anything into anything. So..... if someone who knew enough about tech and medicine (like Raven) thought up what she wanted and named it I should be able to simply pull a 'morph pebble> XXXXX' A thing is it's name, after all! I know that I am. The hard part was getting through to them that I only wanted a single word, not an adjective. I almost cried it was so fustrating, and I was so tired! And I was afraid they would start in with an acronym......
And so, this time I saved Clarissa......
Celia asked me why I was so exhausted. I explained, realizing when it was too late that there were people in the room I wanted never to know of DeadNet; most notably Fiona!
I so hate being carried! But Jacob was doing something to the Font of Power. It can make people into a living Trump! Was I already? Someone had put pants on me. I fought the flashbacks.
I don't understand what Jacob did, and at the time I didn't have the energy to pay it much attention. Something about magic and armies and would I morph an army of robots. I sounded too much like making Azi. It's 1 thing to be Made and slaved; it's another to do it to someone else, knowing what it means. Thalion restated: he wanted only minutely intelligent forces. I think Cerise made them for him. She's a toymaker, she knows all about toys.
I remember a pentacle, skeletons everywhere, a dark flame Jacob took into himself, Samara wailing about the Font......too much noise to sleep.......
This guy Merlin, Dara's son no less!, was made High King of All Reality. So that's what all the experiments were about; manipulating this to this point! A High King needs other kings to be over. Jurt got Chaos. Celia accepted Rebma. Jack was willed Amber by Martin. Gerard took the Golden Rose.
Jacob was made Protector. I protested that he would be unable to keep objectivity. I winced at the look he threw me. Thalion was appointed to balance him.
And what do with the Azi? Who got the Diamond Axis? Who would be Master after Delwin? Would the Silent Revolution stay just that? Would you have let it? I'd almost decided to speak when Jack caught my eye, urging me silently to take the Crown. I said that Azi should rule Azi. Merlin agreed! He put me forth.
Jacob saw a chance at revenge for imagined slights; he whispered to Laurel and she suggessted Croyd. Merlin asked who Croyd was: an URDA that worked she said. And it's true! And they were right, Croyd is superior to me and far stabler. So I emailed him on it. But all he wanted to do was play with 'the Jaunquille', which I understood completely.
Jacob was furious! He said at least twice that we should have Croyd come here and have him say himself that he didnt want the job. I may be many things, but I am not a liar and I never have been!
Samara rounded on Jacob screaming at him about the ethics of being a scientist and a Shroudling vs. what he may or may not've done to me. On and on she yelled; if I could have hid I would have! She just made things worse between me and him. It was true, and someone had to say it. But not in front of me!
Raven also took a turn at Jacob; I'd never seen her so angry! She explained to him what he'd done. It reinforced my view on him as a dangerous meglomaniac. I added sociopath right there and then.
Oh! Laurel and Jack were married by the High King. I'd never been to a wedding, I just wanted to sleep.....
So I was made King of the Diamond Axis. Summoning the last of my strenth I made a Trump-Sketch of Black. I pulled him through to me and as he kneeled beside me I said that: We were URDA, I was King. I never swore fealty to Merlin, it felt too much like...... I dont know...Azi? No one knows more about social hierachy than an Azi. Urda's little delusion, huh......?
It's a dilemma; to serve your function often means wanting to please your Master(s). It does for me. And for Jade. Ghostwheel wanted his father's approval too. I'd tried to explain the Azi-Master thing to Celia and a couple other people.
I liked that Cerise called me a very complex toy. I am. And a
weapon, and a tool, and.......
The term `Azi' comes from C.J. Cherryh's book Cyteen.