The following was created as a possible story for Haptic Press, but it didn't fit the theme. After the background stuff is the full script for an eight page first installment. Yes, this is the first time I've written a piece in full script format, I vastly prefer prose. }-> At the time of writing it, I didn't know who the artist would be, but I was guessing it would be someone fairly new at the game, so I included as much instruction as I could. I patterned my scripting style after Priest's. You may note that I forgot to include a story title or include specific directions for where the credits go. Oops. Everything copyright 2000 by Dave Van Domelen, of course. MINUTEMAN: Basic proposal In 1937, a strange, glowing meteorite was found in the Rockies. Local wildlife had been oddly mutated, and seemed stronger. Scientists immediately started studying the strange rock. In 1942, the Chicago Project (hidden in San Francisco's waterfront district) was authorized, with Operation Battalion going into full swing. The intent was to use the chemicals in the meteor to create supersoldiers. A hundred volunteers, all of whom were otherwise unfit for military service, took part. By the time they ran out of meteor, 99 had died. Jack Lee, born Li Shiping, was a third generation Chinese-American who had been kept out of the army by his asthma. He survived the treatments and gained superhuman strength and agility. As the only success of Operation Battalion, he was given an armored and padded (to make him look more muscular, as he had a Bruce Lee physique, not a Schwartznegger bod) costume that totally concealed his identity, and trained as a commando soldier. He became the Minuteman, and fought a number of important battles on the home front against Bundists. Using the data obtained from the original hundred, Operation Battalion scientists managed to create a modified procedure. Another hundred volunteers were treated. Only a handful died, and six came out with moderately superhuman strength and agility. These six became the Second Squad. By this time, Minuteman was publicly known, but his identity was not. The PR men decided that it would be a really bad idea to reveal Jack's true identity. And yes, this was largely a racist decision, although the potential backlash of people thinking him to be Japanese did factor into things. So Cory Miller, a small-time actor who had been recently drafted, was put into the Minuteman costume for public appearances. It helped that he filled out the costume without needing padding, plus he had matinee idol looks and blond hair, blue eyes. Jack didn't care for this, but he went along with it. In 1945, with the war over, Jack managed to get included in one of the victory parades (Cory was ill, although there were rumors Cory and Jack had become friends, and Cory took a dive to let Jack have his moment of glory). Against orders, Jack removed his helmet. Everyone in attendance thought it was a joke, and one in poor taste. Jack resigned and went to ground, using his commando training (there had been some plans to use him against Mao) to fade away. As for the Second Squad, one died in Korea, two in Vietnam, and a fourth committed suicide in the late 1970s after his marriage failed. One of the side effects of the Battalion treatment had been vastly slowed aging...the Seconds looked to be in their mid 30s by 1975, and the one guy's wife was nearly 60. Jack, however, had stopped aging entirely, which forced him to move on every few years before someone noticed he wasn't getting older. Karl Tolliver, one of the surviving Seconds, managed to parlay his contacts and fame into business wealth and power. He started searching for another meteor in 1980, reasoning that the one which granted Minuteman his powers couldn't have been a one-off. In 1984, using an improved version of the process which had created the Seconds, Jason Miller (grandson of Cory) was turned into the new Minuteman. The Reagan administration made much of him as a patriotic hero, and did its best to suppress the fact that Jack had been the real Minuteman. Jason died in action in 1990, supporting the Iraqi government in an operation in Iran. This was covered up by the Bush administration, and his death blamed on a plane crash over the ocean. The truth came out in 1992. Tolliver personally hated Bush (they'd butted heads during Bush's tenure as head of the CIA), and had made sure the information found its way into the right hands. Perot picked up most of the support Bush lost, but Clinton still won handily. The only real effect here was that Perot was a slightly more credible candidate in 1996, and the Republicans slightly less credible as a whole. Jack started finding it harder to stay hidden, since his face was now plastered all over as a campaign issue. In 2000, Tolliver finally found a second meteor fragment. He knew he needed Jack in order to figure out what made the Battalion process survivable. But Jason Miller's version of the Seconds process told him enough to give one of his off-the-books bodyguards superhuman strength. At a cost. So he sent the man after Jack, whose general location Tolliver had determined.... http://www.physics.ohio-state.edu/~dvandom/minuteman.GIF shows a crudely computer-colored version of Minuteman's costume. Here's a few details not necessarily clear from the pic. 1) His helmet is a solid piece of smoked armor glass. 2) Those things at his hips are twin Colt 1911A automatics. He keeps spare clips along his belt at the small of his back. 3) He has a sergeant's rank hashes. 4) The fabric of the outfit is thick, like canvas. It should NOT be drawn like spandex. He should have very little muscle definition showing when in costume. In any case, most of the "muscles" are padding, as Jack's got a Bruce Lee body type, but is made to look like a Captain America. The Seconds wear the same bodysuit, but with corporal's rank (two hashes). They don't wear helmets, and they're all white. Each has some idiosyncracy to identify him, such as a handlebar mustache, glasses, etc. Tolliver has a scar running along his left cheek. Not a big ugly one, but it should be clear in the art. Out of costume, Jack Lee is a wiry, muscular Chinese man. Think Bruce Lee bodytype. In the 1940s he has a severe buzzcut, while in 2000 he has short hair, but not cropped too close. Try not to give him Bruce Lee's face, though. If the artist needs a face reference, work from Jackie Chan. In any case, he should look Chinese without looking like a stereotype. FIRST STORY SCRIPT PAGE 1 Splash page. "Minuteman and the Second Squad" logo at the top, should look 40s-ish. "and the Second Squad" will be in smaller letters. At the center of the page, Minuteman is charging out of the page, both pistols drawn. Flanking him are the six men of the Second Squad. Think Nick Fury and his Howling Commandos here for a pose. There are two captions, both near the bottom right of the page. CAPTION 1: It started in 1942, with the Chicago Project and Operation Battalion. CAPTION 2: It ended in shame and disgust and a truth people spent decades burying. PAGE 2 There's four panels on this page, the page divided into equal quadrants. Caption placement is up to the artist, be sure to leave room for them, though! Panel 1: Minuteman, without a helmet. His face is basically Steve Rogers, blond haired, blue eyed, square jawed, etc. It's a torso and head shot, he's looking up and to the right, smiling. Light background, strong lighting. CAPTION 1: Cory Miller was the public face of Minuteman. Panel 2: Minuteman, without a helmet. This is Jack, so use whatever face you decide on for him. Torso and head shot, mirror image of the one in panel 1. The background is dark/night, the lighting is poor and casts shadows. Jack is grimly determined. His hair is cropped almost to nothing. CAPTION 2: Jack Lee, born Li Shiping, was the TRUE face. Panel 3: A line of men comes from the upper right to the lower left. They're shirtless, and should be kinda indistinct and iconic. The idea is to stress their anonymity. The one at the head of the line is being injected with something from off-panel, we only see the hands/arms of the doctor. CAPTION 3: A hundred men, unfit for military service, volunteered for Operation Battalion. Panel 4: A cemetary, stocked with plain markers. The vanishing point for this is the upper left corner. The idea is to make it look like the line of men in panel 3 and the lines of markers in panel 4 emanate from the same point. CAPTION 4: By the time they used up the last of the strange, glowing meteor, ninety-nine had died. PAGE 3 This page has five panels, with the following layout. The top half of the page is divided into three horizontal strips. Each will have a caption, and the captions should lead from upper left to lower right (so, caption 1 would be on the left side, caption 2 in the middle, etc). The lower half of the page is divided diagonally, from upper right to lower left. So panel 4 is a triangle that's "above" the triangle of panel 5. Caption placement in these two panels is up to the artist. Panel 1: Distant figures of Minuteman and the Second Squad racing across a battlefield, firing their guns as they run. Minuteman is using his pistols, but the Seconds have rifles. Nazi troops flee before them. Action is from left to right. CAPTION 1: Joined by the successes of the second wave of Operation Battalion, the Second Squad, Minuteman cut a bloody swath across the Axis. Panel 2: A tickertape parade runs from left to right. A blurry crowd outline forms the bottom of the panel. Minuteman and the Second Squad ride in open cars. CAPTION 2: They were celebrated at the end of the war, conquering heroes. Panel 3: Same crowd, but now a review stand is in the center of the long horizontal panel. Minuteman is at the microphone, flanked by the Seconds and a few officials. CAPTION 3: Until... Panel 4: Two captions, one near the top and one near the bottom. Closeup of Jack lifting off his helmet with both hands. CAPTION 4: ...the truth came out... CAPTION 5: ...and no one believed it. Panel 5: In shadow, Jack is walking off down an alley, his costume abandoned in the street behind him (at the left 'point' of the triangle). CAPTION 6: And Jack faded from the public eye for the next half century. PAGE 4 Two panels, divide the page horizontally into roughly equal halves. The setting for the rest of this story is San Francisco's Chinatown, but not the touristy part of it. Try to find decent references, but it shouldn't be too important. Panel 1: GOON (he doesn't really need a name) is lifting a car over his head in a medium-tight shot. GOON has way too many muscles for his own good, think Bane as drawn by Liefeld or something like that. He has a barely sane look in his eye. He might be drooling, if the artist thinks that works visually. Caption 1 should be at the upper left corner. CAPTION 1: It started again in 2000... BURST 2 (GOON): MINUTEMAN!!! Panel 2: Pull back across the street. People are generally fleeing from this monster who can lift a car. Two BYSTANDERS (1 and 2) are in the foreground. They're Chinese, artist can pick the other details. They look like they're about to run, but haven't quite chosen between fear and curiosity. BURST 3 (GOON): NNNNNNNGH! (as he starts to throw the car) SPEECH 4 (BYSTANDER 1): But...Minuteman died ten years ago! SPEECH 5 (BYSTANDER 2): Maybe he means the first one...he might still be around... SPEECH 6 (BYSTANDER 2): But I don't plan to be! (boldface the I, connect the speech bubbles 5 and 6.) PAGE 5 Six panel grid, two across, three down. Try to create the visual sense in these panels of someone zigzagging down two flights of stairs, since that's what's happening on this page. No need to actually draw it as a zigzag, just try to direct the motion that way. Panel 1: We see a clenched fist coming in from the left side of the panel, and the right side of the panel is a window, with a view of GOON throwing the car down at street level. This is a third floor apartment. THOUGHT 1 (JACK): Damn it! He must be a Battalion.... Panel 2: JACK is racing down a set of stairs, from upper right to lower left. He's dressed casually, but moves like he's sprinting on level ground. The thought bubble should probably go over the stairs so the artist doesn't have to draw detail under them. THOUGHT 2 (JACK): "How" can wait. "Why" I KNOW I won't like. Panel 3: JACK is rounding the corner of the stairs, heading to the right of the page. THOUGHT 3 (JACK): And WHAT the hell did they DO to that guy? Panel 4: Closeup on Jack's hand, he's reaching for a gun that he no longer wears. Position him so that he's heading down and to the left, he's on the stairs again. THOUGHT 4 (JACK): On my BEST day I couldn't lift a CAR! Panel 5: JACK has reached the bottom of the stairs. He's grabbing a push-broom and pulling the handle out of the brush part, so he can use the handle as a weapon. Maybe a small "squeak" sound effect where the handle meets the flat brush piece. Panel 6: View over JACK's shoulder out the door to see GOON pounding in the roof of the car he'd thrown. If possible, try to show an air of "Oh, crap" in Jack's posture. THOUGHT 5 (JACK): Damn, I wish I had a gun. PAGE 6 This is a slightly odd layout. The first panel is a horizontal slice, roughly the top quarter of the page. The second panel is an inset burst in the upper left of what's left of the page. The rest of the page forms a sort of backwards L shape. Panel 1: JACK is leaping from the left at GOON, who is just starting to turn around and notice JACK. Panel 2: Inset panel. A meaty fist is grabbing JACK's ankle. Panel 3: GOON stands erect on the right side of the panel. He has JACK by the ankle, and JACK is sprawled out to the left, filling the rest of the backwards L-shaped panel. His stick is still in his hand, but about a foot of it has broken off one end, leaving a jagged point. GOON has a gloating expression, JACK has a "I'm in deep dung" expression. BURST 1 (GOON): MINUTEMAN! THOUGHT 2 (JACK): This was a VERY bad idea... PAGE 7 Five panels, with some tricky panel-crossing stuff. The third panel is a horizontal strip maybe two inches high across the middle of the page. Panels 1 and 2 are side by side at the top, likewise for panels 4 and 5 at the bottom. An H-shaped layout, more or less. Panel 1: GOON is hauling JACK up with his free hand, grabbing onto JACK's shirt collar. GOON is grinning, not quite sanely. SPEECH 1 (GOON): TIME'S up, Minuteman! Panel 2: GOON now has JACK by the collar with both hands. We're looking over the top of JACK's head at GOON's face, which really doesn't look too sane at all. Thought bubble should go on the back of JACK's head rather than obscure the tight focus on GOON's face. THOUGHT 2 (JACK): He's INSANE! But he knows my face...! Panel 3: This gets tricky. At the far right of the panel, JACK is breaking the hold GOON has on him, by thrusting his arms up between GOON's and forcing them apart. Since both are super-strong, this results in JACK's shirt being shredded. In the middle of the panel, JACK is vaulting backwards, face towards the sky. Yes, we're going for a "strobe" effect here. Violating panel boundaries, JACK is tumbling in a tight curl across the gutter between Panel 3 and Panel 4. Panel 4: JACK lands in a catlike pose, finishing the arc that went through Panel 3. His stick, with jagged point, is in his right hand, and held flat to the ground. JACK's back is to the reader, and he's in the lower left corner of the panel. GOON stands at upper right, really frothing now. SPEECH 3 (JACK): Who sent you? Panel 5: GOON leaps from upper left corner of the panel, JACK is cringing back in the lower right corner, as this wall of muscle threatens to fall on him. The "spear" point is coming up. BURST 4 (GOON): DIE!!! PAGE 8 Four equal panels, page is quartered. Panel 1: Figures in silhouette as GOON impales himself on the point of JACK's weapon. He's falling from left to right, the jagged point should point more or less at the upper left corner of the panel. SFX 1: SLUUUTCH! (or whatever you think works for impalement) Panel 2: GOON lies dead at JACK's feet, the spear still sticking out of GOON's back. JACK is looking down at the body in moderate anger and disgust. THOUGHT 2 (JACK): Damn. Panel 3: The scene from Panel 2 is copied (photocopied, scanned, redrawn, whatever works best for the artist) onto a monitor screen in a darkened room. We see a shadowy figure from 1/4 profile (mostly from behind, in other words, but not totally), his features lit by the glow of the monitor. We see him from whatever side TOLLIVER's scar ISN'T on. But yeah, it's TOLLIVER. SPEECH 3 (TOLLIVER): Very good. Yes.... SPEECH 4 (TOLLIVER, linked): Jack is still alive after all, and the new serum was a qualified success. Panel 4: TOLLIVER stands to reveal his face, which has the scar seen on page 1. He's in whatever dramatic pose the artist think best fits the panel. There's a caption at lower right. BURST 5 (TOLLIVER): Soon, this "Second" will be FIRST! CAPTION 6: To be continued?