Sitting here in the basement, I think of the day
I think of the weekend and write bad poetry
Yeah, Goldfinger kicks ass and I love the sentiment
but what the fuck? Who says I don't care?
Who says I'm not into it, that it doesn't matter?
I should sit out? Would that I could, but no...
it won't work. I hate it. I hate it so badly
so truly so emphatically I hate it all and...and
do I really want to die? Or do I just want every
/SINGLE/ fucking unseeing unhearing uncaring idiot
who lets what counts slip through and die to /suffer/?
Suffer, yes. Die? Maybe. Maybe, maybe...do /I/ care?
Yes. I care so much it hurts. Thinking on other levels
seeing with different eyes and hearing with my bones
and holding close that which, those who I love -
it hurts so horribly badly when they don't see it,
when it doesn't work. Why don't they see it?
Why doesn't anyone see what I see, or feel any of it?
Everything's there in plain sight, everything's here.
And everything's inside of me, wrapped up tight and
so full of thorns and twisted metal and edges and pins
and cutting me up, and I could break it all. Want to,
want to and need to and wish to holy god in heaven 
that I could and not kill myself for doing it, after.
Just what do I think I am?

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I love you!
But you're so hard to see, through misted glass
And in the shade
and through the rain
and behind your sunglasses
with someone else.

Who are you?
An extension of me? My animus? My confidante?
or a friend
or my guardian
or the one who keeps me sane?
Who holds me back..?

Who am I?
A shadow of you, or my own self?
lost on the road
driving in circles
seeing light and dark
never really knowing the difference.

I hate you!
You're so perfect, so whole, fulfilled and sane
thinking you're a jackass
but so goddamned confident
and loving even your mistakes
I don't hate you, I hate me.

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"Long and Pointless Title" - TAFKATAC

Standing on the counter of the kitchen sink
I watch the water rise
Kinda grody liquid with a greyish hue
The color of your eyes
Murky and depthless and trappin' me square
Keepin' me on my toes
Dangerous, angry, but oh, so calm
I'm drownin' in front of your nose

I'll never see a faucet runnin' the same way ever again
Who knew that when I saw you it was so close to the end?

I climb a little higher to the breakfast shelf
Leaving would be wise
But wisdom always pikes ya one when things get rough
And sells the time it buys (For a profit!)
I'm losin' myself inside of you
No Exit, signs say, so it goes
So please keep me sane 'til I find my way
Then I'll let go the compass rose

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