From hellshot@disinfo.net Sun Jun 24 15:03:39 2001 Date: 29 May 2001 18:01:23 -0000 From: Chance Johannson To: brainy9@eyrie.org Subject: Fwd:Spike log On Mon, 28 May 2001 13:17:34 +0800 Sarah Alderdice wrote: >5/26/2001 4:27:03 PM >The bar isn't quite a wretched hive of scum and villainy. It's more a dive than a hive, and "villainy" is far too classy a word to use on a place like this. In any case, it's pretty pathetic. Miserable hoodlums might frequent it. Not notorious occultists. >The hell with that. Constantine sits at the bar, smoking and leaning against the counter. No, he's not drunk yet, and he certainly won't be *that* drunk for a while. He's just in a bad mood and feels like slouching. It's not a very *particular* bad mood. No catastrophe struck his life. But he has nothing to do and he couldn't find anyone to go home with, or take home with him, tonight. And so he broods. Or sulks, if you want to put it less elegantly. >Good evening, starshine, the Earth says hello. Spike is in a fantastic mood as he makes his way to the bar and slams a palm down on the countertop. "Another please James, if you would be so kind!" he trumpets cheerfully. He's almost caught up with Drusilla, he can sense it. "Cheer up, mate," the mopey blond guy is advised by the undead creature of the night, "might never happen." >Constantine lifts his head from his hands to give Spike a tired look. "Whatever it is, if it's bad it'll probably happen the moment I cheer up," he mutters. How does that guy get his hair to look so naturally unnatural? Also, where does he get off thinking he has the right to be so happy? Life is so unbelievably unfair. John knew this already, of course--better than most people, even--but he doesn't like being reminded. >Life may be unfair, but undeath is bloody fantastic. Spike snorts, amused. "Don't let me disturb your self-pity, I'm sure." He's very pale under the lights surrounding the bar, collecting his beer and sitting himself down. Why not pester the nice man? >Constantine isn't *nice*. At least, not compared to people other than Spike. "You weren't." He crushes out his cigarette in the ashtray, not looking at the vampire. "Seeing someone that bloody cheerful just makes the happy little spirit of self-pity skip with joy." Needless to say, the sarcasm in his voice would be heavy enough to floor Hercules. >Now Spike is feeling the need to snap this guy's head off and drink what comes out. Of course he doesn't know that what comes out would be hideously unpalatable. "Oh, that's so sweet of you to say. So what's the problem, girl leave you? Bank foreclose?" >But it would sizzle nicely. "Yeah, well, I'm just a terribly sweet person." Constantine glances at Spike. The guy is too pale. He needs to get out in the sun some more. (This is, no doubt, a sentiment with which Buffy would agree. Although for different reasons.) "Nah, I just feel like moping." In other words, go away. John twitches slightly and glares at...no one, actually. "I didn't *ask* you," he mutters under his breath. >The vampire shoots a curious glance at the empty space. "Talk to yourself much, do you? Not that there's anything wrong with that." Spike grins, and just for fun, fangs glint briefly. "Don't mope. Bank holiday weekend, after all." >Constantine smirks at Spike. "Oh yeah, it's *lots* of fun." Go *away*. He blinks as he notices something. Wait a minute, are those fangs? Probably not. You're just getting paranoid in your old age. (Okay, so thirty-six isn't old at all, but it can sure feel that way when you're in a bad mood.) Lighting another cigarette, he goes back to his drink with grim determination. >"Couldn't swipe a fag off you, could I?" Spike is looking hopefully at Constantine's cigarette. >Constantine pulls another cigarette from his pocket and puts it ungraciously on the counter without once looking at Spike. There, now go away and let me, um, talk to myself in peace. He's not looking at the vampire, but his bright blue eyes keep flickering back and forth between any number of perfectly innocent empty spaces. >Oh, goody. Spike lights the cigarette with his own lighter, repockets it and takes a deep, welcome drag. He exhales smoke in the general direction of Constantine's apparent attention. "You should probably get an exorcism done. I know a bloke." >Now *that* garners a reaction. Constantine simultaneously drops his cigarette onto the counter and nearly chokes on smoke. "*What*?" Oh come on, that reaction was not mere disbelief or incomprehension. >Dark eyebrows raise. "All right, don't have an embolism, just a suggestion." Spike is amused, though, and curious. And hungry. "Why the overreaction?" >Constantine picks up his cigarette from the counter, having managed to avoid setting the place on fire. He gives the vampire a *look*. "Most people don't see a bloke talking to himself and say he should get an exorcism." That was, yes, a good part of the reason for the reaction. John wasn't expecting this guy to be so direct. Also, well, exorcisms make him uneasy. This he doesn't say, although he certainly *looks* uneasy. >"Yeah, and most people don't look like they've seen a ghost when they *hear* the word exorcism." Spike smirks. "Excuse the expression." >Cute. John wants to hit this guy now. He's starting to wonder if it would have any effect, though--maybe he *didn't* imagine those fangs. "Yeah, well, I haven't got the best memories associated with the word." If he's lucky Spike won't take this as an incentive to start thinking back on recent (for him, anyway) occult history. >"Oh, really?" Spike does indeed think. Being in America for a while takes you right out of the loop, he's finding. Stupid California. Stupid sun all the time. Thinkthinkthink...oh, hey. "What's your name, mate? Just out of interest." >Constantine buries his head in his hands again. Why him, why him. He rethinks this, lifts his head from his hands to down the rest of his drink, and then returns to his prior position. "John Constantine." This night is not looking up. It's looking right down at the floor. >"I knew it!" Spike is all excited now. "I've heard of you! Man, where've you been hiding the last few months?" It's John Constantine! >Constantine looks up once more to *blink* at Spike. Oh dear. "Yeah, look how surprised I am." Everyone's heard of him, or at least everyone in his field. Usually he likes it, uses it, but sometimes it can be a real pain. "I've been here," he says, shrugging. "Mostly. I move around a lot." > Harvey is very amused at the mental image of a giddy Spike he has in his head. :D >"Oh, tell me about it. I've been out of the country myself." The vampire offers his hand. "Spike." Have heard of me! > Spike :D > Constantine heehee. Um, does Spike have a reputation himself? I haven't watched Buffy in ages, I need to read some transcripts of earlier Spike episodes. I adore him. :) > Spike does, yes.:) > Spike is very well known, actually. William the Bloody. Murder, pillage, about 120-odd years.:) > Constantine snickers helplessly. Sounds like you're advertising a company. "The Best In Our Field for 100 Years." Okay, so maybe it's just that I have a sick sense of humor. ;) > Spike prouds.:) >Constantine shakes the offered hand, looking faintly bemused. Then the name sinks in. "William the Bloody?" he asks, brows lifting. Oh look, he *didn't* imagine the fangs. Lovely, a famously violent vampire is thrilled to meet him. He's sure this says something less than complimentary about himself. > Harvey says "You're such a good role-model to yesterday's youth, John." > Spike :D :D :D Can I have your autograph?! > Constantine just facepalms. :) >The vampire's hand is chilly to the touch. Spike is indeed delighted. Amazing who you meet when you're not paying attention. "Can I get you a drink? What've you been up to lately? Saved the world? Me too!" >Constantine may be slightly disturbed by this, but that doesn't mean he's going to turn down a drink. "Um, all right. Ah...yeah, once or twice," he replies offhandedly. Saving the world, all in a day's...well, not exactly work. More like in a day's causing havoc. Wait a second. "You did?" This is something new. >"Yeah!" Spike is all overexcited. "Sunnydale, Akathla, whole big eating-the-world thing. The Slayer and - have you been there? You should go." >The professional world-saver is looking mildly irritated. "Sunnydale? Akathla? Why wasn't I there?" Why didn't he *know*? "You *helped* the Slayer? Why didn't she, well, slay you? Or did she try?" Wait a moment. The answer to another train of thought arrives at the station. "The town in California? I'd heard odd things happened there but I'd never got around to going myself." Now he's annoyed that he didn't. Which is odd. He thought he'd be happy to know that the world could be saved without his help. >"Yeah, well, desperate times, desperate measures. She's cute, you should see her." Spike finds himself slightly distracted. "Um...yeah, there was this whole big demon-summoning thing. Anyway. Not important. How's magic lately?" >"Really?" John adds that to the list of reasons he should go to Sunnydale. Cute Slayer. Maybe he can pick her up. (In his dreams.) "Yeah, not important," he echoes dryly. "Just a routine invasion from the depths of Hell. Right." He *does* try not to build up expectations, but all the same, he didn't expect quite this reaction. But well, notorious vampire meets notorious occultist, anything can happen. "Still completely mad," he replies with a shrug. "Catch a hungry demon here, mess about with a prophecy there, that sort of thing." He considers. "Actually the first part was in New York, so *that* wasn't 'here' either." Oh well. >Oo, messing about with prophecies good. Spike glances around at the pub. "Yeah, seems all a bit quiet around here. Now I remember why I moved." He eyes Constantine. It's an unpleasantly speculative glance. I bet I could get paid plenty for taking you down, chummy. >"Yeah, around here you actually have to *look* if you want to find something odd," Constantine agrees. "Some places weird things jump at you on every street." He catches the worrying gaze from Spike out of the corner of his eye, but he shows no sign that he's noticed. He hasn't survived this long with that reputation of his by being an easy target. >That's definitely becoming a speculative *stare*, now. "You're supposed to be pretty difficult to kill," remarks Spike ever-so-casually. >Constantine is actually, on a physical level, as easy to kill as anyone else. But he's smart. Most of the time. And somehow his insane gambles tend to pay off and leave him his life. And so he manages. He's far more a con-man than a magician. "Really?" He rubs apparently absentmindedly at the back of his neck. "Nice to know what I'm supposed to be." >"I've taken out Slayers before." Spike drinks some of his beer, watching Constantine over the glass. "You don't look so tough to me." >Constantine turns to face Spike now, meeting the vampire's gaze full on through a cloud of smoke. It's harder to deceive someone that way, but easier to make them think that they're not being deceived. "Yeah, well, appearances," he says with a dismissive shrug. >Yellow light glows dimly in the vampire's eyes. Or maybe it's just the light reflecting. Spike says quietly, "I find appearances are only deceiving in the case of vampires and Slayers. And you're neither, Johnny-boy." >Is Constantine scared? On some level, sure. But he can't afford to let the fear take over. His best chance here is to just keep going, and if he's lucky, this will end to his advantage. If he's lucky. "What a narrow world you live in, Spike," he says coolly. But he allows a flicker of something to show in his expression: worry, maybe. >"I don't think so." Spike is very confident, cocky, and he's got three beers in him, which helps somewhat. "I think you're a bit worried. How much are you worth in pieces, John?" >Constantine is cocky himself, but he's slightly more sober than Spike at the moment, and, well, he's damn good at what he does. Which *isn't*, despite popular opinion, so much magic as it is deception. He licks his lips nervously. "Depends on who you ask." >"I'll make this easy for you." Spike is feeling generous. "Give me a good reason *not* to kill you." >Constantine takes a shot at the easy way out. No sense putting his life at more risk than he *needs* to, especially considering the state of his soul. "There are people down in Hell who'd love to see me dead, yeah." He pauses a moment, considering. "And then there are people, or things that occasionally resemble people, who'd be in trouble. And *their* first reaction would be to get bloody furious at whoever was responsible." >Hm. Fury of higher powers. Spike considers that, quite seriously. Gotta go back there one day, after all, if the theories about what vampires are are correct. And he's got no reason to doubt. "I spose that qualifies as a reason." >Constantine doesn't look relieved or anything. He just smiles at Spike. "Good of you to think so." He *is* relieved, though. Damn vampires, going all giddy at meeting an Occult Celebrity one moment then wanting to kill him the next. >He's back to excited now, if that's any help. "So tell me about the last demon you faced down, was it all big with" Spike gestures "claws and.." >Some part of Constantine's mind definitely finds this amusing. He has Alan Moore's sense of humor, remember? "Oh yeah, claws and a long ugly tongue. Actually, I was in a hospital at the time, so I couldn't really *face it down*." He smirks. "We just chatted." And exchanged blood, but that's neither here nor there. >Spike looks faintly disappointed. "Chatted? I thought you were all for saving the world. Drama and all that." >Constantine pauses a moment, a grin twitching helplessly at the corners of his mouth. "I was in a *hospital*, mate, and for a reason. I couldn't do much world-saving there. I did mess up the demon's plans for me, if that's any comfort." >"Well, it's just..." Spike sighs, all disappointed and let down. "You're pretty famous. I spose I expected you to be taller or something." > Constantine says "Well, this is better than being told 'I thought you'd be more well-hung.' ;)" > Constantine says "(Damn Raif. ;)" >Constantine shrugs, clearly amused by now, and grinning faintly. "Well, maybe you need to update your worldview. 'Appearances are only deceiving in the case of vampires, Slayers, and famous magicians.'" >"Ha ha," says Spike sourly. "It's your round." Yes, he really expects Constantine to buy a round. >"Oh, I've got one?" Well, it's probably a good idea to humor the sulky vampire, Constantine decides. He tosses his cigarette end into the ashtray and continues, "All right. But only 'cos I'm feeling generous now that you're not going to try to kill me. It would've been troublesome." >"Would've been bloody lethal." Spike drums his fingers absently on the bar. "You haven't seen a lady vampire, dark hair, seems sort of eccentric, have you?" >"If you say so." Constantine is utterly nonchalant. It's an attitude he's practiced to perfection for years. "I don't think so. Or I didn't notice." Pale, dark-haired, and eccentric-seeming could describe any number of women. >He'd remember. Spike is enough in love that he's sure of that. "Well...bugger. I'm not having a very good week to be honest with you." >Constantine gives Spike a curious look. "Oh?" he asks, tone neutral but inquisitive. Now that he's not in immediate danger of getting horribly killed, he doesn't mind using the opportunity to learn more about this vampire. >Spike glooms. He's good at that. "I'm trying to catch up with this girl." Understating beautifully there. "And she's a lot more elusive than I thought she'd be." >"Ah. *That* kind of bad week." Constantine shrugs and offers up a sympathetic look. Yes, sympathetic. He's used to regular *humans* wanting to kill him; he's not going to hold a grudge against a vampire for it. Then again, neither is he going to forget it. "Dunno what to tell you, except that she can't disappear forever. There's only so much world, after all." And if there were ever any people who had world enough, and time, it's vampires, right? >"Yeah, you're right." Spike sighs. "Bloody women. I hope you steer well clear, do you?" He tips his half-empty beer glass back and forth, idly. >The vampire gets a bemused glance. "Of women?" Perish the thought. "Or of getting too attached to one woman?" John stares into his own glass. Lights another cigarette. "I don't really need to worry about *that*, anyway. Whenever I get close to someone they tend to die." The alcohol's made him a bit more open. >"Really? Me too." Spike finds that amusing, chuckling quietly to himself. After a moment he sobers and gives Constantine a curious look. "Why's that then?" >Constantine doesn't find it amusing, so he just sulks for a moment. "I dunno," he says bitterly. "'Cos I don't take care of them, I s'pose. Or just 'cos I have bloody awful luck. I s'pose theirs is worse, though," he admits. His eyes dart very briefly to one side, then deliberately away from it. I'm not liiiistening. >"That who the ghosts are?" Spike is happy with the idea of ghosts. Dru talks to herself all the time. >Constantine tips back quite a bit of his drink at that, then slams the glass back down nearly hard enough to break it. "Yeah," he says sullenly. *He's* not happy with the idea of ghosts, dammit. >"Oh, relax, they're just dead. Bugger off!" Spike suggests to the ghosts, and takes a drink himself. "That must be a hell of a bind. Ghosts trailing you around the whole time." >Constantine remembers, vaguely, that he's dealing with a vampire here who would have been as happy to kill him as talk to him. Guilt can't be a familiar concept to this guy. "You can't imagine. It's not *all* the time, just when I least want 'em to show up. And that's worse." >Spike has almost no concept of guilt whatsoever. He's heard of it, of course. "Really? Huh. Vindictive. What'd you do to deserve that one?" >Probably in much the same way that Constantine has heard of integrity. It's a nice place to visit, but he wouldn't want to live there. And he doesn't visit it often, for that matter. "I killed them, or got them killed." By now the two categories are blending together a bit in his mind. >"Oo, really?" Spike glances behind himself. "Does that happen to everyone, then, or is it just you?" >Constantine can't help but smirk a little at Spike's reaction. "Nah, I'm the lucky ghost-winner." He eyes his glass. It's depressingly empty. >Spike isn't going to buy another round. He's just not that kind of vampire. "Here's the thing that puzzles me. If you're so bloody famous, world-saving and all, why don't you get something done about em?" >Bastard. "I dunno," Constantine says eventually, although he does know. He's accepted them, under the instinctive realization that there's nothing he *could* get done about them--and also the mantle of guilt. On some level he thinks he deserves them. As much as he might disagree with that on *other* levels. >"You're not on one of these self-pity guilt trip things, are you?" says Spike with considerable disgust. That reminds him of Angel. What a let-down you're proving to be, John Constantine. "Please." >Reminder number two of who he's dealing with here. "No," Constantine replies defensively. "They're the ones who try to give me guilt trips." And succeed pretty damn well, to be honest. But he's not honest. >"Get em exorcised! You don't have to put up with that. You're meant to be the best." Spike eyes Constantine. >Constantine looks away. "I don't think they're the kind of ghosts you can get exorcised." And on yet *another* level, he doesn't want to get rid of them, because as painful and guilt-inducing as they are, they're all he has of his friends. Not that he'd ever admit that to anyone, of course. Hell, he barely ever comes close to admitting it to himself. > Constantine gets angst on Spike. Worse even than demon blood! > .Spike says "Eek! Angst on my jacket!" >"Bollocks," Spike is very sure of himself today, "any ghost can be exorcised. I read about it somewhere." >Constantine glances uneasily back at Spike for a moment, then down at his empty glass. Dammit. "You believe everything you read? I didn't think you were *that* stupid." >"Don't call me stupid, John," says Spike mildly and rather quietly. He drains the last of his beer. "When I get annoyed I sometimes don't think about the consequences of ripping someone's head off and using it as a football." >Constantine is unruffled. He's practiced that unfazeability, honed it near to perfection. Near. "I'll remember that in the future." But see, he succeeded in distracting Spike! For the moment, at least. >"Besides which, I've seen em done." Spike means exorcisms. "You shouldn't dismiss it out of hand, there are some very competent people out there." > Constantine kills a vampire in Nethack. Hmm. ;) > Spike eeks.:) >Damn. "I s'pose you would've." Spending over a century as a vampire offers the chance for lots of weird experiences. "Right, I'll look into it." He hasn't the slightest intention of doing this, a fact that he carefully hides. "I'm sure there are." Not me. >"No you won't," says Spike easily. "But it's your problem, see if I care." He regards the empty glass. Someone should buy a round. >It's not John's turn to buy. "I know you don't," he says simply, without accusation. Just stating the facts. For once he's grateful for that vampiric self-centeredness. >But Spike is an evil vampire and doesn't feel like buying. "Wait till I tell everyone back in California who I met." >Constantine can't help but grin. "Wait till I visit there," he adds. He just has to, especially now that he knows that the Slayer is cute. >Oo, hey, will you pretend like you know me and I can be all casual about it and - Spike isn't quite able to get *that* giddy over this. "Oh, the Slayer'll just love you. Her and her Watcher's Council friends." >"I'm hoping she will," Constantine assures Spike. Hmmm, Slayers are supposed to die young, aren't they? He just hopes she's legal by the time he gets there. "And I'm sure her Watcher's Council friends already know all about me." He smirks, adding to himself--as much as anyone does. >And it's then that a black-haired man in a black trenchcoat enters unceremoniously, sucking on a cheap cigarette. He glances over the inside of the pub, then raises his eyebrows when his gaze falls on Constantine and the man across from him. He approaches slowly, so John can spot him and warn him off if it's business. Pete Wisdom. >The approach of the newcomer is noted and Spike glances around, eyebrows raised. He's far too pale, even considering the lighting in here. "Your date's here." >Constantine blinks at Spike, then looks. And laughs. "No such luck, mate, it's only Pete Wisdom. Friend of mine." Synonym, "doomed." He waves Pete over. >Wisdom just gets this -look- at the pointer. You know the one, narrowed eyes, vaguely annoyed twist of the mouth, otherwise utterly unimpressed. "Bite me," he says, stopping at the table. It's said offhandedly, not meaning to be any more offensive than the initial insult. Then he inclines his head at John, blowing smoke ceilingward. "Cheers. Who's this, then...?" >Hugely amused at the very very appropriate Americanism, Spike grins pleasantly at Pete and waits to be introduced. > Wisdom knows, he -knows-. I couldn't help it. > Spike beats Pete for punnage.:) > Wisdom ows! :) > Constantine is worse, I titled a log "The unwise and the inconstant" once. ;) >Constantine nearly chokes on smoke at Wisdom's words. He's not sure whether to be horrified or helplessly amused. Regaining his equilibrium, he decides not to say directly the source of his reaction. "Pete, this is Spike." Pause. "He's a vampire," John adds cheerfully. >It's probably worth the horror of the pun to see the matching horror on Pete's face. Priceless reaction. You can literally see the blood drain from his face; he goes as white as a sheet. Quite dramatic, really, especially in contrast with his black hair and coat. "Ah," he says, and there's quite a lot in that 'ah'. He manages to recover some of his dignity, and extends a hand to Spike. "In that case, please don't." >I am Jack's Desperate Attempt At A Straight Face. Spike takes the offered hand and shakes it, a tad over-firmly. Just because. "I'll do my best." The vampire's hand is chilly to the touch. The grin cannot be denied, and fangs glint in the dim light. "Won't you sit down?" > Wisdom gives two points. > Spike woos. >"I'd tell him to be good," Constantine says to Wisdom, poker-faced himself, "but I don't think he'd listen." No kidding. He eyes his empty glass. "You know, you should buy drinks. It's not my turn, and I don't think he's," he nods toward Spike, "going to." >"May as well," shrugs Wisdom, taking a seat, stubbing out his cigarette butt in the tray and fishing for another. "I'll collect someday, though. That's when you'd better watch." He flashes John a grin, then sort of waves, glancing back to see if there're any waitstaff looking. Too lazy to get back up. He finds a cigarette, lighting it almost carelessly with a smallish hotknife. Definitely not tiny, though. Nope. Definitely an established presence. "You owe me, Constantine." >"Couldn't get a fag off you, could I?" Spike is very into smoking other people's cigarettes, dark eyes intent on Wisdom. Give me a cigarette or I will kill you horribly. >Now there's a mutant power that would be *really* useful if only it came with the twin ability to produce cigarettes out of thin air. According to *some* people, anyway. "I'm always watching my back. And sometimes my neck too." Not that he's really worried about Spike trying to kill him *that* way. Unless there's a snapping noise involved. Constantine goes still at Wisdom's words. Blinks a few times. "Do I? I lose track sometimes." >Wisdom raises his eyebrows, digging the pack out again and holding it out to Spike. Cheap and nasty *menthol* Lambert & Butler. "I'm a rich bastard," he says, "I've a lot. Take -two-, even." My god, was that sarcasm? Then he grins at John again. "You owe me for Mulder, first off. And you owe me a round, now. You got a waitress?" >Menthol?! Spike doesn't care, the vampire sense of taste is lacking in any case. He takes three. "I had a waitress," he observes, master of the deliberately unsettling remark. >Constantine winces. "I *could* say that meeting would've gone better without you," he mutters half-heartedly. "But I won't." He pauses. Looks at Spike. Opens his mouth to say something. Closes it again. Finally, he says to Pete, "Ain't he charming? All right. Why are you reminding me that I owe you now?" >"That doesn't help us get drinks, does it?" Pete asks Spike drily, extending a much more dully glowing finger, in case the vampire's been bumming matches, too. And no, it's his index finger. He looks back at John, a funny expression on his face. "Listen, mate, if you'd warned me he was obsessive, I might've kept quiet, all right? And I'm just keeping track. I notice if I don't it always ends up being me owing you." >In fact, Spike has his own lighter, and the glowing finger gets a raised eyebrow. Vampires and fire don't mix well. "Obsessive? Who is?" Not that he cares. >Constantine glances back at Pete, not looking the slightest bit sorry. "Well, I did tell you that he was paranoid, and that he investigates paranormal events." He's utterly unrepentant. Sorry. He just doesn't see it as being his fault. "Does it?" This in a mild, innocent tone to that last comment of Pete's. "FBI agent who gives me trouble whenever he sees me in the States," he explains to Spike. "I...made some mistakes when I first met him." > Spike relays everything they say to Mulder through the magic of metagaming! > Constantine baps Spike! > Spike owwws. > Wisdom points, laughs. >Wisdom isn't about to confess how easily he let himself get manipulated by Mulder, though. He has -some- pride. "Fucking merchant banker went off on this big conspiracy; I've got more immediate worries." Not that he -won't- help Mulder, it's just not his top priority. He'd made that clear enough from the start. Pete glares at Spike. "You didn't top *this* area's waitress, did you?" >"Kill him," Spike suggests reasonably to Constantine. That's what he does when someone bothers him! Except for Buffy. For some reason. Hm. No no, focus. The vampire gives Pete a broad smile and exhales smoke. "Actually I've not eaten yet tonight." Yellow gleams faintly in the dark eyes. > Anubis says "Buffy has nice.. uhhh.. spikes! Yeah!" > Spike says "She's very...good at...I don't fancy her! *broods*" > Wisdom looks up, shakes his head, and goes back to reading Buffy/Spike fics. > Constantine fears. ;) > Spike sobs, I love her and she hates me. *wail* > Wisdom says "What you need is some gratuitous TS!" > Constantine says "Yeah, there's a Buffy on here, page her up!" > Wisdom says "Totally!" > Anubis says "I'm ga--oh. *brood*" > .Spike makes sweet love to Athaliah! "You're right, Pete, I feel so much better." > Wisdom leers at Anubis. > Athaliah says, "Hey!" > Wisdom says, "See? :)" > Athaliah says, "Damnit. Sex with a vampire that has a period. I guess I could do worse." > .Spike says, "I have a cute accent." > Athaliah says, "You're supposed to be out of the mood when you have your period, man!" > .Spike says, "I'm always in the mood, baby!" > Constantine has a better accent, because he doesn't have some American actor! And my hair color is actually found in nature. ;) > Anubis eats .Spike's jacket. > .Spike sobs. > Anubis barks evilly and sends his army forth to conquer Delaware. > Raif cracks UP. >Constantine pauses to look at the vampire for a moment. "His partner would kill *me*." Of course, he has other reasons for not killing Mulder--i.e., enough of a conscience to really dislike gratuitous murder--but this is the one he tells Spike. He also gives him a mildly annoyed look. Hungry? Go ahead then, bite *me*. > Spike says "Someone give me a railroad spike. I'll show John what I do to people who turn out bad-tasting.:)" >Wisdom takes a drag off his cigarette as Constantine explains his beautiful logic. He watches Spike for a moment, then grins, leaning forward a bit - elbows on the table - and clasping his hands together. His fingertips are incandescent, and the glow suffuses his hands, fading as it nears his cuffs. And oh yeah, his eyes are a solid, luminescent red. "Just make sure," he says, managing to speak around his cigarette, "you like spicy food before you bite into something that can burn your mouth." Abruptly it all disappears; the waitress is finally on her way over. > Wisdom says "Your face would melt off." > Wisdom says "I've got pictures!" > Spike eeks, while also thinking - wow, cool. > Wisdom says "Start with your mouth, then your lower jaw would turn to jelly and dribble down your lovely silk shirt. ;)" > Constantine says "Ew. ;)" >There is a moment's pause. The vampire looks from Constantine to Wisdom and back again, then sighs and sits back, taking a drag on his cigarette. "Bollocks," he mutters, disgusted with the whole thing. > Wisdom says "Wherever the blood touches would be like sulphuric acid, all bubbly and gross...:)" > Wisdom thinks I'll stop now. ;) >Constantine says absolutely nothing about "something that can burn your mouth." He's not one to let people know when he has an ace up his sleeve. He can't quite help but tell Spike, "Cheer up, mate, might never happen." He sounds like he's quoting something. Oh yeah, and he calls up a smirk for a moment at that. >"Whatever they've been getting and a double scotch in a cracked glass with cigarette ash in," says Pete to the waitress, all sunshine and roses. He sits back, reaching forward as he does to tap his own smoke in the tray. Then he grins, eyes kind of unfocusing, looking at the table surface. "Neighborhood kids used to call me a mutant. If they only knew." God what fun. >"Oh, piss off," says Spike crossly to Constantine. He's hungry. "Now I'll have to detain a waitress." >Sunshine and roses don't really fit in here. "Whatever we've been getting," Constantine echoes to the waitress. It's not that he's drunk enough to have forgotten, he just can't be bothered to remember just this second. He studiously avoids looking at Spike, not trusting his ability to do so without cheerfully offering himself as the vampire's next meal. That would be bad. He doesn't want Spike furious at him and in great pain at the same time. >"Oh, the horror," says Pete mildly, making the 'world's saddest story played on the world's smallest violin' motion with his hand. "I'm sorry if I don't look sympathetic. I'd really rather not die, at the moment. In fact, I'd probably better head out after this drink; Pryde'll be done with her computer voodoo and looking for me." He peers at John. *Has* the urban mage met Kitty yet? >Spike makes an executive decision. "Screw the pair of you. I'm gonna go and find somewhere less freakshowlike to be." A pause, and he remembers who he's talking to. Constantine is earnestly addressed. "You wouldn't...you wouldn't sign something for me, would you? Just to prove I saw you." > Constantine DIES. > Wisdom LOL! > Spike says "Please?:)" >Constantine peers at Pete for a moment, then shakes his head. "Computer voodoo. I won't even ask." Nope, he apparently hasn't met her. Then he stares at Spike for a long moment. Finally, he starts to laugh. "Tell you what." He reaches to clap a hand on the vampire's shoulder for a moment. "You can tell people you met John Constantine and he was a bastard, and they'll nod knowingly and believe you." It's all too true, and John knows it. >Wisdom almost chokes. And stares at Spike. "You...want his *autograph*?" He stares a second longer, then bursts out laughing. "'Ere, John, I've a permanent marker somewheres...maybe he wants you to sign his bum..." >Vampires move very fast, when they want to. Spike aims a fist, hard and accurate, at Pete's nose. >Constantine winces at Pete's words. That's not going to endear him to--ah. It did not, in fact, endear him to Spike, John sees. He doesn't try to nobly intercept the punch or anything. It's not as if he *could*. >It connects. The spook's got a few moves of his own, though, and even as he's got this shooting pain through his head he makes a grab for Spike's arm, you know, at his face, and his hands flare up red. "Keeb goig," says Pete, eyes as red as the blood starting from his nose, tone neutral. "Kand tek a bloody joge..." >The vampire snarls and yanks back on his arm, yellow light dancing in the dark eyes. He gets away, but it's a very close-run thing indeed. "Fuck you." A quick glance to Constantine, and Spike is heading for the door. Bastards with powers and stuff. > Anubis says "Kick his ass, Pete! Woo-woo!" > Wisdom says "Jeez. I didn't try and punch Spike when he called me John's date. :} This justifies me in my eyes! ^_^" > Spike giggles. You go Pete.:) > Wisdom sighs, bah. ;) I just hope, you know, Spike never realizes I can't flare up when unconscious. ;> > Spike says "You would be in trouble then.:)" > Wisdom says "Indeed. :>" >Now, the one who would've been defenseless against the blow is Constantine, but fortunately for him he's already convinced Spike not to kill him. Yes, he had to. John watches the vampire until he's gone, then glances back at Pete. "Don't piss off vampires," he advises. Come to think of it, he probably should've mentioned this one's reputation. Just like he should've mentioned Mulder's obsessiveness. Oh well. "You okay, mate?" >"How the fug did I doh 'e couldn' ztan' th' test've 'is ode bedicid?" grumbles Pete, fishing some somewhat-less-than-clean napkins off the table and pressing them to his nose, tilting his head back. "Sub people hab senses ob hubor. 'E fuggin' don't. A'd I'll lib." >-- > >Get your free email from http://www.outgun.com > >Powered by Outblaze > ____________________________________________________ FREE Disinformation E-book - http://www.disinfo.com