Team Cynical

Current author: Bill Dickson

Golden Grunion Awards:

1993: Best Supergroup
1993: Best Creative Use of Title

Ramrod's brow furrowed, and he looked over at High Jinx. "Did you really just say that?"
"Say what?" High Jinx asked.
"'That's where you're wrong,'" said Nora. "You actually said that. How cheesy."
"Did I really say that?"
"I am afraid so," rumbled Dynamite Vest Man. "In response to this villain's rather badly-timed comment, 'Team Cynical is not going to show up to stop us,' you uttered the rather melodramatic response, 'That's where you're wrong.'"
"Whoo. Sorry about that."
"No problem," the villain assured him.
"In any case," said High Jinx, "Surrender at once! We have come to apprehend you, and put an end to your diabolical plans!"
"What's with you?" Ramrod asked.

Current Members:

Headquarters: The Cynic Pit, a group of refurbished rooms in the catacombs beneath Seattle.

Vehicles:

The Cynicalmobile, a perfectly ordinary, red, 1990 Geo Storm with Washington plates.
An ancient and totally derelict Herrstimelyite Warspite-class starship that is costing them a great deal in property taxes while it decays still further on the blasted ruins of the Microsoft campus in Redmond.

Notes: Team Cynical began to form in April of 1993, when Ramrod and High Jinx offered living space to their new friend, Dog Thing. When Ramrod and High Jinx were captured by Mr. Bad Example's minions, Steel Monkey and the Intruder, they were rescued by Dog Thing and Nora Bergensen (alias Rainy Day Woman). Dog Thing took on the alias Dynamite Vest Man, and shortly thereafter Nora moved in and the four teamed up to protect the Pacific Northwest as Team Cynical. The formation of the team spanned a series of stories that underwent several name changes: Ramrod and High Jinx; Ramrod, High Jinx, and Dynamite Vest Man; Ramrod, High Jinx, Dynamite Vest Man and Rainy Day Woman; and finally episode one of Team Cynical.

Team Cynical would be popularly known as the world's least expensive superteam, if they were popularly known at all, which they're not. They have virtually no money, all of their equipment was donated by Andy Awesome, and they heat their apartment with the methane emissions from an exceptionally gaseous cow. If not for the generosity of Todd, the Anarchist Revolutionary Werewolf Bartender down at the Bigtime Brewery and Alehouse, they might not even be able to obtain sufficient quantities of decent microbrew.

Team Cynical is a somewhat precarious team. Their continued existence as a team depends largely on scraping together enough money to keep themselves fed, while their continued existence as viable living beings depends largely on a set of powers and skills that seems woefully inadequate when compared with the various other metahumans and superpowered teams in the world. But they're a plucky bunch, and through a mixture of cleverness, fierce determination, attitude, luck, and utter pigheaded stubbornness, they always seem to come out on top.

Significant Storylines:

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