There's far too little cannibalism in modern societies, at least the kind that involves eating other people's livers to gain their power. Although oddly, it seems to have been carried over into the corporate world, there's not enough people eating other people. I mean, have we come so far from our roots in the distant past that it's no longer all right to leap on someone and rip out his throat with your teeth? Is it no longer all right to ... Hm. You know, it actually isn't. Complaint withdrawn.
So, how 'bout that biscotti?
Out in space, OZ is outfitting a raw material sattelite (the same one that Quatre's father died on?), which essentially consists of strapping thrusters and mining equipment onto an asteroid and tossing it into Earth orbit to be disassembled for use. The OZ commander is about to report to Lady Une on the matter, when the defenses detect a shuttle approaching, no, wait, too small to be a shuttle.. sheesh! Haven't you giant robot freaks ever heard of "fighters"? OZ's defense forces launch and shoot at it a bit after it refuses to go away, but soon they realize that this is no mere little thing, this is ... a transformer!
(o/~ ... more than meets the eye ... o/~)
The 'shuttle' transforms into a Gundam, to the surprise of none of us, as w e see the OZ troops shouting "It's transforming... it's a GUNDAM!" plus about a minute of pure giant robot porn as we see the Gundam lovingly depicted from several angles in various stages of its transformation.
Then the Gundam lays waste to the entire place with a single shot from its double-barreled gun.
Oh, great, it's Dragonball Z and the power-up games all over again. By the end of the series, we'll have single giant robots with the capacity to destroy the entire Earth by themselves.
Close in on the cockpit of the Gundam, where all we hear is the pilot's raspy breathing, and, finally, the light shifts and we see it's Quatre in there. Uh oh. He's gone a bit wrong.
Meanwhile, Lady Une and the Foundation guru... oh, man, I forgot his name again. Grife. Uh, anyway, he's continuing to urge her to dispose of the Gundam pilots, since they're too darn dangerous to have around. Une replies that Heero is the only pilot they have who's mastered the use of the Mercurius, so they're still handy to have around even though OZ is about to begin mass production of the Veii and the Mercurius. Then, Une gets word that a resource sattelite has been destroyed, and is rather surprised about it. She and the guru suspect an independant agency, until they get further information - Quatre broadcast the blueprints of his old Gundam to them, to prove precisely who he is. Une and the guru each want to send out their new toys, but Une prevails, deciding to send out the Veii and the Mercurius to deal with this, and holding the Mobile Dolls in reserve to defend the moon base. Conveniently, Quatre has said where he'll attack next... one of the colonies.
Next, we get to see some kind of org chart pairing up the Doctors with the Gundam pilots, presumably from Une's perspective, since it doesn't include Quatre... but does include the other four, including Trowa. So, she knows what he's up to? Hmm.
Meanwhile, Trowa goes to visit the Five Doctors, who are currently locked up. He gives them the latest, then wanders to pick up Heero. The Doctors muse that it must be Quatre, and he must have completed a Gundam they had around only in blueprints... but the firepower it weilds is such that even the Doctors had hesitated to build it. They muse that anyone who'd want that kind of firepower must be unbelieveably hostile.
Trowa goes to fetch out Heero, while Duo complains bitterly that for once, he'd like to be the one to go. Duo complains so much, in fact, that Trowa finally storms over and punches him in the gut, then wanders out with Heero. Wu Fei suspects for a bit that Trowa probably has gone completely over to OZ's side, until Duo reveals that Trowa slipped him a new toy while punching him - a little slide show projector he got from the Five Doctors, with helpful specs on the two new Gundams for Wu Fei and Duo to oogle.
Out in space, Trowa and Heero converse amiably with each other as they get into their mecha, despite the fact that it's an OPEN MICROPHONE, you IDIOTS, and EVERYONE ELSE CAN PROBABLY HEAR THEM. Cough, cough. Sorry. I'm all better now. Anyway, Trowa is finally pleased, suspecting that once they meet up with Quatre and get Wu Fei and Duo fixed up in new mecha, it'll be time to once more turn on OZ. Heero, however, feels something isn't right, and suggests that Trowa remain hidden longer, until they figure out just what's up with Quatre.
Meanwhile, on the designated colony, all the civilians have been evacuated, and only OZ troops remain to defend the place. Sure enough, Quatre shows up and starts kicking booty. It turns out that double-barreled gun can seperate into two guns, allowing Quatre to do a death-blossom-like effect. If you missed it this time, don't worry. The same footage is used at least three times in this episode alone, and looks to be joining the standard chunks of stock footage in the animators' archive. Despite heavy fire from the colony defenses, Quatre simply doubles up his gun again and blows the entire place up in one shot.
Back in prison, Duo and Wu Fei view the little widget, with Duo having much the same idea as Trowa, that everyone's going to join up again and be keen. Wu Fei, however, has a bad feeling about this.
In space, Trowa orders a course change, and Heero notes that something's really not right - Quatre just destroyed a space colony? Trowa still is as chipper as a bland fellow like himself can be, and the two, along with a horde of space Leo suits, head out to intercept Quatre at another space colony.
Quatre beats them there again, although the colony has apparently already been evacuated. They send some goons in to investigate, finding Quatre stomping around having a bit of a tantrum and generally breaking things. He then, of course, wipes out the redshirts and wanders out to deal with everyone else. The Veii's cannon gets dodged, while the Mercurius' shield proves able to block the Wing Zero's beam cannon. The space Leos get wiped out with a bit of stock footage. Trowa remarks happily that they don't have to worry, Quatre's churned out a really kickin' Gundam, but when he tries to hail Quatre, he's just told not to get any closer. Naturally, he goes closer anyway, and gets blasted for his troubles. His Veii must be a lot tougher than the colonies, or, more likely, it's only hit glancingly, because it only loses one entire side, leaving Trowa blinking stupidly out of the missing side wall of his cockpit.
Around this time, the guru shows up in the moon base command area with some minions and overpowers the duty officer, then has the air supply turned off to the prison. That'll get rid of those pesky doctors and Gundam pilots. The Five Doctors are rather irritated by this, but mostly joke about it and get snippy with each other. Duo makes an attempt to break out, but finally gives up and returns to complaining bitterly about the whole situation while Wu Fei calmly continues viewing schematics on the widget.
Out in space, Quatre rants about how the colonies have become all military, just like Earth, so he's going to destroy all of them, froth froth froth. Trowa is rather dumbfounded, but Heero, who has a much lower tolerance for this sort of thing, just attacks. Quatre is made to drop the big-ass gun, and the two go at it with... beam swords? Heero remarks that even if he doesn't know what to believe in, he'll believe in himself, or something like that, but anyway, he won't let Quatre destroy the colonies. Or something.
Rant 'o the day contains no additives, preservatives or alien spores of any kind. Use only as directed. Do not expose to direct sunlight. Do not fold, spindle, multilate or remove identifying tags. Handle with care. Contains less than 3% milk fat by weight, not by volume. Certified 'Syndicate Approved'. Squeeze the lemon. Remember, kids, only users lose drugs.
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