...

I wish I was poetic, then I could at least put vague feelings down on virtual paper and have people nod sagely in vague incomprehension. Even if all I had to say was something like:

I guess I'm not a very poetic person. I'm certainly not big on the literary criticizm aspect, in that instead of analyzing deep meanings into something that's obviously a piece of crap, I tend to just say "Damn, what a giant piece of crap". It's a wonder I survived high school English classes.

For example, e e cummings. What kind of crack were the textbook writers smoking when they considered this to be important. It's not important! It's random bits stitched together for no readily apparent reason! It's tripe! More importantly, it's tripe that people think is actually important! English! English, you bastard! In English, we write things that make sense, at least generally, and when they don't, we don't often pretend that it's some god-given treatise on the meaning of the surrealism of the underlying metaphor! Unless it's a political speech. Or we're cultists. Or it's poetry.

I guess I'm just a poetical philistine.

Or, more likely, an engineer. A Southron engineer, no less. ("Whut? Y'all makin' those funny things with the words 'n all, again?")

'cos if you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? Other people, of course.

Damn. Need a moral message here. Give me a sec...

Wheel of morality, turn turn turn, show us the lesson that we should learn...

"Mum! Dad! Don't touch it! It's evil!"

Vegita and Dodorian verbally spar for a bit, and Vegita offers Dodorian his Scouter... and then blows it up to tease his fellow villain, claiming to no longer need it. After all, he picked up the idea of using the Force... er, his own powers to sense things while on Earth. Dodorian tries to talk tough with Vegita, and is finally goaded into attacking, whereupon Vegita promptly kicks his spiky pink ass. But not before letting slip that Krillan and Gohan are also on Namek (by saying something to the tune of "No way! Even those little Earthlings couldn't do that!")

But Dodorian begs for his life, and offers Vegita a secret in exchange for letting him go. A secret about Vegita's home planet (and Goku's, too, since Vegita and Goku are the same race, Saiyan). It seems the Saiyans were Freeza's henchthings in Freeza's plans for... whatever Freeza is planning, conquering planets at the whim of their master. But eventually, years of battle led to many Saiyans having the strength to threaten Freeza... so he detonated their whole planet. Vegita, who was away at the time, was told it was just an asteroid strike, and continued working for the F-man.

Vegita nods sagely, enlightened by this knowledge, and blows Dodorian's spiky pink butt away with a single shot.

Goku, meanwhile, is still en route, and doing one-armed pushups at 20 G. Badass? Badass.

Vegita goes looking for Krillan and Gohan, who of course sense him coming a mile away and hide. He can tell there's a disturbance in the Force, but without his Scouter (which he begins to regret destroying) he can't find their precise location. So he just starts searching patiently. Gohan and Krillan cower for a bit, before Krillan says to hell with it, and decides to challenge Vegita, since by this point he's decided they're doomed anyway. But just then, a truly giant fish jumps up out of the water, and Vegita decides that was what he sensed. Shrugging, he takes off after the Dragonballs (which he can now sense).

Krillan and Gohan sulk as they stroll along (with mini-Namek in tow), and eventually locate the cave where Bulma was hiding. At first, they can't find her, until they notice she's popped open a 'Capsule House' at the back of the cave. That Acm...er, Capsule Corp. I tell ya, you can get stuff anywhere.

Bulma surls at them for leaving her alone all this time, then suffers a mood swing as she tells them Goku is en route. The heroes morale promptly improves as they realize they're finally getting a first-stringer of their own on the battlefield...

The Morning Weather: Cool and clear.

Rant 'o the day contains no additives, preservatives or small woodland creatures of any kind. Use only as directed. Do not expose to direct sunlight. Do not fold, spindle, multilate or remove identifying tags. Handle with care. Contains less than 3% milk fat by weight, not by volume. Squeeze the lemon.

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