From the Files of Doctor Stomper #7 The Poverty Plot copyright 2007 by Dave Van Domelen )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( Abstract A review of the metaeconomic theory that leads to temporary bouts of impoverishment in individuals and groups that should otherwise be effectively immune to such financial difficulties. Introduction: Any student of net.ahuman history is familiar with the Net.astic Nine, founded and led by Fred Franklins, also known as Mr. Thingy. Doctor Franklins invented Thingy technology, the basis for such LNH equipment as flight.thingies and com.thingies. He founded the Net.astic Nine as a corporation, funded by the profits from his many commercially viable inventions and with a roster full of individuals of diverse and exceptional talents and net.ahuman abilities. Doctor Franklins did all the right things in setting up Net.astic Nine, Incorporated, and while one could certainly expect certain reversals of fortune, at the very least none of the members should ever have had to worry about where their next meal was coming from. They might lose access to their amazing equipment, get kicked out of the Mando Building or even find themselves temporarily out of work, but the Franklins fortune itself was shielded from liability by the nature of corporate law, and in a pinch Mr. Thingy could just let everyone live with him in Load Island until he cranked out another million dollar invention and the team got back on its feet. But, as history shows, that was not the case. On no fewer than twenty occasions, the Net.astic Nine found itself not only bankrupt, but also destitute. On three of those occasions, they employed their special talents to earn money until the crisis was resolved, on five they participated in various races or contests and used the prize money to get the team back on its feet, but in all of the remaining cases, they were reduced to menial labor and other unskilled work. How could this happen at all, much less a dozen or more times? Especially since every time it did happen, Doctor Franklins took steps to further ensure his team's financial stability? The occasional theft or records tampering is to be expected when one's enemies include supergenius sociopaths, but twenty times? And the Net.astic Nine are far from the only victims of these circumstances. The Undefinable Irony Man has been rendered homeless at least seven times, despite always having quarters at the LNHQ he could rely on, for instance. The answer lies not in any rational field of economics or finance, but in the actions of the Writers. Specificially, what has become known in metaeconomics (that branch of metaphysics dealing with the activities of notional or extradimensional beings on the economy) as The Poverty Plot. The Poverty Plot Defined: The Poverty Plot occurs when a Writer decides that an otherwise well-to- do person or group should lose all their money, or at least access to resources, and be reduced to some sort of low-ranking employment simply to make ends meet. The victims must normally be quite capable of rapidly rebuilding fortunes via their skills or net.ahuman abilities, and be somehow prevented from doing so by means of a Plot Device of some sort, or simply Bad Writing (1). The Poverty Plot rarely lasts for long, and is resolved either by the removal of the Plot Device, or by the acquisition of a counter- balancing Plot Device (either mundane such as the prize for winning a contest, or extraordinary such as finding a rare artifact worth millions of dollars). Once The Poverty Plot has passed, the status quo rapidly returns. But no matter what precautions the victims take once back on their feet, they are no more or less likely to suffer from The Poverty Plot again in the future. It should be noted that The Poverty Plot should be distinguished from The Poverty Condition. The latter ensures that the victim's status quo is to be impoverished regardless of any efforts to improve their lot or net.ahuman abilities that should be usable to alleviate financial difficulties. The Poverty Condition is related to The Poverty Plot in its origins and certain characteristics, but generally violates common sense less frequently and in smaller ways. The Poverty Plot should also not be confused with situations in which the subject finds themself on the run from the law. Legal difficulties can also lead to temporary and easily reversed financial troubles, but without defying logic. For instance, when Fred Franklins was suspected of murdering a scientific rival, his assets were frozen and he was unable to even get any sort of well-paying job while on the run. In short, when a rich person becomes poor for no logical reason, but only for a short time, it's almost definitely The Poverty Plot in action. Causes of The Poverty Plot: The root cause is, of course, Writers. Those cosmic entities that shape the lives of those of us who live in certain classes of reality (the so- called "ficitonal realms" or "storyworlds") delight in causing conflict and strife. Inflicting The Poverty Plot on someone might give them the same sort of pleasure a particularly cruel child would derive from taking a toy away from a younger sibling. But even when the motive is not overt cruelty, it often reflects some weakness of skill or character on the part of the Writer in question. The primary motives can be broken into four classes: cruelty as mentioned already, motivation, conflict generation and reader identification. "Motivation" - If a Poverty Plot is resolved via the acquisition of some Plot Device, or success at some arbitrary task, it is likely that the Writer is using it as a prod to get the victims to participate in some sort of quest or competition. For instance, while it's trivially easy to interest the Walking Argument in a debating contest, getting the entire Net.astic Nine involved requires an external goad. And thus, when the Net.astic Nine participated in the Great Net.verian Debate and won the prize of five million dollars that let them emerge from bankrupcy, you can be reasonably certain that a Writer took away all their money specifically so that when they heard about the GND they would be motivated to participate. Similarly, when Irony Man participated in an alien beauty pageant in order to use the prize money to buy supplies to let him fix his Spaceflight.thingy, it was likely a variant of the Poverty Plot. The Poverty Plot is a motivational bludgeon in these cases, forcing its victims into actions that are out of character for them, rather than trying to shape events or personalities more subtly and carefully over time to lead to the same outcome in a more natural way. "Conflict Generation" - There are many ways to turn teammates against one another, and The Poverty Plot can drive a wedge between members very easily, especially if it looks like one or more of the members were to blame for the loss of fortune. Thus it was when it seemed that the Walking Argument's and The Thingy's island resort venture had collapsed the finances of the Net.astic Nine, the team temporarily broke up over the assignment of blame. Again, as tools go, The Poverty Plot is pretty blatant when used simply to create intra-team conflict. For instance, the events surrounding the infamous island resort could easily have led to the Net.astic Nine breaking up without also rendering them implausibly poor, it just would have taken longer and more effort on the part of the Writer. "Reader Identification" - It is not as well known that the Writers do not meddle in our lives purely for their own enjoyment. No, they also seek to entertain others of their ilk, known as Readers. And it is the insidious goal of "reader identification" that gives us things like teenaged sidekicks, slang dialogue that is a year or two out of date, and variations on The Poverty Plot. Writers often believe that Readers will be more interested if the protagonists are somehow more like the Readers (hence teen sidekicks when a Writer is aiming to interest younger Readers). And this inevitably leads, in the hands of a certain class of Writer, to the belief that Readers in inglorious circumstances wish to see their heroes similarly reduced and humbled. That somewhere out there, Readers who performed their reality's equivalent of flipping hamburgers would want to see The !Visible Woman in hairnet and corporate polo shirt behind a cash register. Of course, this misses the point of the interdimensional flow of Drama, in which Readers and Writers alike feed Drama into "fictional" realities in exchange for being able to witness lives unlike their own. Escapism on a cosmic scale, if you will. But how good is escapism if these paragons of net.ahuman ability you read about are as incapable of avoiding minimum wage jobs as you, the Reader, are? Thus, in the end, the situation becomes less believable and the protagonist less worthy of being the focus of escapist fantasies, not more "identifyable". Certainly, a level of realism and conflict is necessary for stories to generate Drama, but use of The Poverty Plot purely to increase the similarity between Reader and read-about generally has more negative effects than benefits. The earlier-mentioned Poverty Condition also generally arises from this misguided goal of Writers. Believing that Readers will be more interested in protagonist with problems "just like theirs", they instead create a situation that reinforces the view that one's difficulties cannot be escaped. After all, if someone who can bend steel in their hands or read the backstory of any object they touch can't use those abilities to make money, what chance does a powerless (2) Reader have? Countermeasures: Other than the usual, well-documented means of avoiding the attention of Writers, there are no defenses against The Poverty Plot. As it is a function of the actions and whims of Writers, any countermeasures you may employ will only improve your odds, not eliminate the risk. After all, a writer lazy or inexperienced enough to resort to The Poverty Plot in the first place probably won't be stopped by (or even have noticed) something as flimsy as a century of corporate case law precedent. Unfortunately, if you're a likely target, it's probably because Writers find you inherently interesting, and hiding may not be an option. In that case, it may be best to adopt a sort of zen-like attitude towards the whole thing. After all, it's only temporary...your job sweeping floors may only last long enough for a single montage before the Writer dangles the carrot in front of your nose that will let you get out of financial difficulty. Just accept it as one of the prices of being one of the world's movers and shakers. Conclusion: In any reality where the Writers are able to shape events, a number of things can cause someone to fall victim to the Poverty Plot. Once in a while, something positive comes of it, but usually it should just be considered a filler story in life's great serial. However, should it persist, you may have been selected by a Writer for The Poverty Condition, in which case, as Master Blaster might say, "Sucks to be you!" (3) Notes: (1) Some theorists consider Bad Writing to simply be a subclass of Plot Device, albeit one that is invisible and intangible, not to mention very hard to counter. (2) Neither Readers nor Writers are truly powerless, but their power is restricted to affecting the outcome of events in realities other than their own. So, while they may effect great changes in our world, they rarely do much of note in their own. (3) Innovative Offense Boy would, of course, phrase it slightly differently, and it would be inherently unprintable.