The March of the Toyhacks an examination of One True Way-ism in toy fandom copyright 2006 by Dave Van Domelen =========================================================================== Okay, any fandom that's been around any significant amount of time is going to generate splinter groups. These splinters will focus on a particular aspect of the fandom as the One True Way, with all other aspects being cheap crap knocked out to make a buck. Transformers G1 fans, Kung Fu Grip GIJoe fans, Classic Trek fans, Han Shot First Star Wars fans, etc. Having run into some particularly annoying One True Wayists recently, I've come to the conclusion that a great many of them share a particular origin, regardless of what fandom they're in. TOIHAAK Syndrome: The One I Had As A Kid. For the rest of this essay, I will refer to these people as Toyhacks. The One True Way of a Toyhack is whatever aspect of the property they were first exposed to as children. Childhood exposure is important here, for reasons I'll go into in a moment...fans first exposed as adults or even teens tend to be less likely to join a splinter group and less strident in their One True Wayism. Of course, everyone has a special place in their heart for their first time. But most people are willing to accept the weaknesses of their first love as well as the strengths, and may well favor later (or earlier) sublines over the one they first knew. Nostalgia happens, but it doesn't rule everyone's judgement. A Toyhack, however, developed a particularly strong emotional attachment to their TOIHAAK line. Not just nostalgia, but a firm conviction that their favored aspect is the best there ever was, all other expressions of the line are pale imitations. I suspect this is because children often have a hazier line between reality and imagination, and have an easier time forming deep emotional connections (or cathexes, to use jargon) with inanimate objects. Teddy Bear really protects them from monsters, GIJoe really IS a *Real* American Hero, and so forth. Older children and adults are less likely to form this kind of connection. Now, unless you're in serious need of psychiatric help, you stop treating your toys as living things by the time you're an adult. Your stuffed animals do not talk back to you (unless you've implanted voice chips), and you do not respect their opinions. But even though you no longer consciously think of them as people, those old emotional connections will linger in some form. A Toyhack's buried emotional connections are so strong that they override other considerations. They're perfectly sane (usually) and may not even consciously be aware of these cathexes, but the connection is the basis of all of their opinions regarding the fandom. Their TOIHAAK is their One True Way. At best, a Toyhack will dismiss any evidence that some other element of the fandom is superior to their focus (or even equal to it) and ignore the flaws of their favorites. At worst, they'll come up with elaborate arguments with no bearing on reality to help support their biases (see, for instance, http://www.shortpacked.com/d/20060501.html for a guy who had Spawn toys as a kid). Toyhacks also tend to exhibit a "you must be a moron" attitude when talking to someone who likes any other aspect of the fandom, viewing any evidence through the "it comes from an idiot" filter. Now, of course, there's degrees of Toyhacking. For instance, many Transformers G1 Toyhacks will accept Alternators as being worthy of their attention, and all but the most inflexible G1 Toyhacks will accept the Commemorative Series reissues. But what defines the Toyhack is that there IS a line drawn somewhere, and anyone who likes anything on the other side of the line simply has no taste. Similarly, it's common to have a rabid Toyhack in one fandom be fairly relaxed in other fandoms, especially those they were exposed to later in life. They may have favored splinters in those other fandoms, but be more willing to rationally argue the merits and flaws of their favorites. For instance, someone born in 1970 may have Kung Fu Grip GIJoes as a TOIHAAK and be blindly partisan of them, hating 3.75" figures and Sigma 6, but only be a partisan of Playstation as a platform without being rabid about it. Modern platform wars simply didn't exist when they were young enough to form a deep emotional connection to Princess Peach. And, since it's likely to be one of the responses to this essay, I'll lay out my own situation. When I was growing up, we were on the low end of middle class, so I didn't get a lot of toys compared to my peers. And the ones I did form emotional connections to fell into three groups: handmade toys my mom made for me, toys or toy lines that no longer exist, and Hot Wheels. Hot Wheels haven't really changed in thirty years, except to reduce the metal content so that the price wouldn't have to change (seriously, I can remember when I was 8 years old, saving my nickels and dimes so I could get an 88 cent Hot Wheels car...they're usually 99 cents now when not on sale). Transformers didn't come out until I was in high school, and I didn't have any of the 70s GIJoes (did have 6 Million Dollar Man, though, that was cool). My first time with most toy lines has been as a young adult or not so young adult, and I don't really have any TOIHAAKs. I'm willing to accept both greatness and abject suckitude from all eras of Transformers. :) But I certainly know plenty of G1 Toyhacks who look down their noses at me for daring to say a Cybertron toy is good.... ============================================================================= Addendum: In the various online and emailed responses to this essay, there have been a few points I feel the need to address, so here we go. 1) Toyhack has implications from the "hack" part that don't seem to fit. What about a different name? Yeah, I had a few, and have seen many suggested, but I just like Toyhack best. My initial idea was The One I Grew Up With, TOIGUW. Pronounced Toygoo. But I felt that it implied too long an association. 2) I'm not a Toyhack! I never said you were. Just because you have a soft spot for the first toys you had doesn't mean you'll end up as a Toyhack. It (thankfully) only happens to some people. If nothing else, most people don't even care about toys at all as adults. 3) I know this One True Wayist who just discovered the fandom when he was 25, and (etc.).... Yeah, not all One True Wayism comes from TOIHAAK. Just a lot of it. 4) Well, if the companies would just stay true to the way the property SHOULD BE, we wouldn't have Toyhacks. Bzzt. Companies, for the most part, are interested in selling toys to kids. That's it. They rarely care what the adult collector market thinks, except when launching specifically nostalgia-driven lines. Besides, the way things SHOULD BE is a One True Way stance. And there's many One True Ways out there, no matter which one the company tries to go with, they'll still annoy most of the Toyhacks.