Dave's Happy Meal Transformers Rant 1. Optimus Prime 2. Megatron 3. Bumblebee 4. Starscream 5. Ratchet 6. Lugnut Permalink: http://www.eyrie.org/~dvandom/BW/Artifacts/McTFA McDonald's gets the Transformers tie-in back after several years of Burger King, and after the highly unsatisfactory movie BK toys, it's about slagging time. :) Unless you like eating Happy Meals anyway, be sure to ask if they have a Customer Satisfaction Pack, which is one of everything. Not all stores will have those in stock right away (some don't get 'em until later, and some hold them back as reserves and won't satisfy customers with them), but it can save you some hassle. Caveat about recommendations: I think you should snap up all of these if you can, even the bad ones. After all, they're a buck each! So my recommendation will be more about whether it's worth pursuing these later on the secondary market, or going out of your way if there's no McD's convenient to you. CAPSULES Optimus Prime: A bit lacking in ways that can't blame the price point, but generally decent. Recommended. 99 cents on its own (your price may vary) Megatron: Vehicle mode is kinda a write-off, especially given the lack of a fusion cannon. Decent statue robot mode. Mildly recommended. 99 cents. Bumblebee: Decent vehicle, so-so transformation and vehicle mode. Could use more color. Mildly recommended. 99 cents. Starscream: Another "forget it" vehicle mode, but a pretty good robot mode in exchange. Recommended. 99 cents. Ratchet: Decent vehicle, worst robot mode of the lot. Very mildly recommended...if you don't get all the toys, this is one to skip. 99 cents. Lugnut: While the robot mode doesn't really feel like Lugnut to me, it's good, and the vehicle mode is probably the best of the lot. Recommended, and if you only get one McTFA toy, get this one. 99 cents. RANTS The Bag: Happy Meals come in flimsy paper sacks these days, not cardstock boxes, so there's not a lot of collectibility here. However, you do have a reason to ask for the bag anyway...it has a $5 off $20 or more in Transformers Animated toys coupon. I should probably go back and ask for a few more bags at some point, I thought the coupon was in with the toy and only asked for one bag. Oops. The "front" of the bag has stock cartoons of Optimus Prime (two-pack art) and Bumblebee, with some brief notes (which I'll list along with each toy review). There's also a "Battle of the Bots" game (tic-tac-toe), a suggestion you challenge your friends to speed-transforming, and "How many words can you make out of OPTIMUS PRIME?" The bottom of the front says to ask about the under-3 toy, but I didn't...the under-3 anymore is generally not tied to either main theme. The left side has the coupon, pics and profiles of Starscream (jet mode) and Megatron, and a simple cipher puzzle. Ratchet and Lugnut get no packaging love. Note, by the way, that the coupon is $5 off any purchase of $19.99 or more...which means it may not work for buying a single Voyager at Wal-Mart (where they tend to be $19.76 or $19.96). The back and right sides of the bag have the Littlest Pet Shop stuff, which is the "for girls" promo teamed with Transformers. The right side also has all the nutritional information for the various Happy Meal foods. On the bottom of the bag, it's revealed that the next promo is Spy Gear for boys and Polly Pocket for girls, so it looks like Wayward will be hitting McD's for a while yet. ;) (For those who don't know what I'm talking about, Wayward does the photowebcomic Insecticomics, and Polly Pocket figures make up most of the humans in her stories.) Individual Packaging: Each is in a clear plastic bag with the same artwork, plus the toy's name and number (the assortment numbers seen up at the top of the review). The art has Megatron in the upper right, Earth Mode but with his fusion cannon removed, and Prime in the lower left, Earth Mode with mask up. Bag size varies depending on the toy, and is not important enough to list. :) Inside, each toy is packaged more or less in vehicle mode, although there's some exceptions for safety purposes (i.e. Megatron's rotor blades are folded away) or for flatness. A single small instruction sheet is included inside, black and white with gray highlights, showing transformation in 4 to 6 steps as necessary. Design Theory: Rather than repeat it in every review, I'll say it now - these are toys intended to sell at the *dollar* price point, while still being utterly child-safe (unlike a lot of the fragile knockoffs found at Dollar Stores). The fact that they transform and have any moving parts not required by transformation is pretty impressive given the limitations they're working under. These are put together using triangle-socket screws specifically so kids can't take them apart, and are generally made from softer plastic that will bend rather than snap. The number of paint applications is rather limited, although some may have more paint at the expense of others having fewer. Also, it seems that they're deliberately de-emphasizing weapons whenever possible. The only one who could really be said to have weapons is Lugnut. For the most part, the Autobots work better in vehicle mode and the Decepticons work better in robot mode, although Prime has a decent robot and Lugnut is good in both modes. For all but Ratchet and Lugnut, the Vehicle Mode is as written on the bag. 1. OPTIMUS PRIME Vehicle Mode: Fire Truck Cab Note: The friendly leader of the Autobots Vehicle Mode: 3" (8cm) long, and I'm a bit disappointed that his front wheels are too far forward to be show-accurate. Given that the molded wheels aren't even what support the toy (little wheels on the underside do), they could easily have shoved the fake wheels back. The cab is red plastic, the underside is blue plastic. The little wheels on the underside are black, as are the robot toes visible in back. His robot arms are clearly visible from behind. However, this is one of the few toys where the head is totally hidden in vehicle mode. There's no paint on any of the blue plastic, although I don't know if it's "unpaintable plastic" or if they just couldn't afford to paint it after all the paint put on the head and torso. The front windows are a dull dark purple, the headlights yellow, and the front grille light gray. There's a black strip along either side which arches over the top of the front grille. No paint in the side windows. Transformation: Variation of the standard Truck Prime Transform. Swing the rear down as legs (it snaps into place), slide the toes forward. The upper arms fold out to the sides from the cab back (sort of ratcheting into place), with the forearms folding down from inside them. Then flip up the head from behind the cab (it snaps into place). Robot Mode: 4.5" (11cm) tall. The torso, upper arms and head are red plastic, the forearms and legs are blue plastic, with the toes being black plastic. The head is sans battle mask. Lack of paint aside, it looks pretty good except for two problems: the face sculpt is somewhat off, and the upper arms are hollow (the forearms fold inside them). Autobot symbols are molded, but not painted, on the insides of the shoulders. The neck and chin are painted light gray, the face is a sort of robin's egg blue (a bit darker than the regular toys), the helmet is a good paint match for the blue of the forearms and legs, the eyes are black (a major part of why the face looks bad) and the antennae on the helmet are yellow (rather than yellow being stripes on the helmet itself). The arms bend at the elbows, that's pretty much it for articulation. The hands are molded into closed fists, but I suppose you could drill out peg holes if you wanted to give him a weapon from somewhere. Overall: There's a few things they could have done better even within the constraints of the budget, but otherwise the design is decent and worth trying to repaint (assuming that the plastic will even take the paints I use). 2. MEGATRON Vehicle Mode: Helicopter Note: The evil Decepticon leader Vehicle Mode: Well, it's his Earth mode. More or less. Because the legs and body are a single rigid piece, it's way too long in back, and the absence of the fusion cannon means the front end is too short. The rotor blades are pitched a bit too far to the sides as well. 5.5" (14cm) long. The tip of the tail is red plastic, the cockpit is black plastic, the arms (they really don't look like anything but arms) are soft light gray plastic, the rotors are soft medium gray plastic, and the rest of the toy is rigid light gray plastic. There's really no paint to speak of that's vehicle-related, it's all robot mode stuff. There's big gaps in the backs of the arms that look ugly in this mode, and overall it looks about as vehicle-like as the altmodes of G1 Pretender inner bots. A random chunk with a cockpit and rotors stuck on. Transformation: Fold the toes forward, flip the cockpit back, push the arms forward, turn the head around and fold down the rotors. Kinda sad. Robot Mode: Well, it's a nice-looking statue of Earth Megatron, 4.5" (11cm) tall. The rotors just hang off the shoulders and the cockpit sticks out his back. There's red paint on the flanks and eyes, black paint on the boots and pelvis. There's also a paint that's a little lighter gray than the light gray plastic that's used on the face and on the sides of the boots (i.e. rather than leaving pieces on the sides unpainted, they painted it all black and then overpainted in light gray). There's a molded but unpainted Decepticon symbol on his chest. The head turns, and that's pretty much it for articulation. Overall: Some paint, particularly on the head, would make the robot mode a little better, but the vehicle mode is pretty much hopeless. If you want to make a good vehicle mode out of this toy, you're better off cutting it up and making a non-transformable vehicle using pieces of the toy as a core. 3. BUMBLEBEE Vehicle Mode: Undercover Police Cruiser Note: The FASTEST Autobot Vehicle Mode: 2.75" (7cm) long, all the bits visible in this mode are yellow plastic. There's black plastic on the underside, including the real wheels upon which the toy rolls. The windows, molded non-rolling wheels and racing stripe are painted black...there's no red paint on the police light. I suspect this is one of the toys that paid for Prime's extensive paint apps by having fewer of its own. There's a molded but unpainted Autobot symbol on the roof. There's a significant gap in the front bumper, and the robot head is visible from the rear, just hanging upside-down in the middle of the rear bumper. Transformation: Flip the head up, pull the arms out to the sides, fold down the feet from the hood and turn the waist. Some have compared it to the original G1 Bumblebee, but I don't think it's really that close other than being simple. It's more of a Micromaster transformation. Robot Mode: 3.5" (9cm) tall. The backplate is black plastic, while everything else (including the now-revealed thighs and head) is yellow plastic. The face is painted medium gray with bright blue eyes (rather sloppily painted on the one I opened). The forearms are painted black, a nice touch given how they're barely visible. He has stubby Spychanger-style arms that barely reach past his chest, but they do move at the shoulders. The waist turns, and the head can tilt back, all of which makes this one of the most poseable toys in the set. The neck is a bit too long, though, which interacts badly with the thick chest and stubby arms. Overall: Pretty good for a dollar toy, but would really have been helped by a couple of splashes of red. 4. STARSCREAM Vehicle Mode: A fighter jet Note: The lying, flying Decepticon Vehicle Mode: A little better than Megatron's, which is damning with faint praise. It looks like a robot lying down with its head turned backwards and its toes pointed. The arms just sitting there really hurt the look, and I wish they'd departed further from the vehicle mode so that the wings would look right in robot mode, since there's really no way to make this look correct in vehicle mode. 5" (12.5cm) long with a wingspan of 4" (10cm). The very tip of the nose is charcoal gray plastic, and the two wheels at the back are black plastic (there's no front wheels, instead there's rounded skids). The torso area is a dark red plastic, and the rest of the toy is a purple-gray plastic. The cockpit is painted orange with a black outline, there's red stripes on the wings, and some charcoal gray paint on the forearms and head. There's molded but unpainted Decepticon symbols on the wings, and the tail section sort of hides the robot face. Transformation: Fold the toes up, pull the legs apart, flip the tail section back and turn the head around. Robot Mode: Other than being a little short in the legs and having the wings pointed the wrong direction, it's actually a pretty decent representation of the animated version. The tail section makes for decent back vanes, and the head mold is good. However, being purple instead of light blue makes the match not as close as it could be. 3.75" (9cm) tall. The head is purple-gray plastic with charcoal gray painted helmet and red eyes. The arms swivel at the shoulders, the head turns, and the legs swing apart (so you can stand him with legs together or apart, which counts for articulation among this sort of toy). If you raise his arms above his head, the wings look right. Overall: Another write-off vehicle mode, but the robot mode is pretty good. 5. RATCHET Vehicle Mode: Ambulance Note: None Vehicle Mode: Clearly where the effort was put for this toy. 3" (7.5cm) long, mostly very light gray plastic with red plastic on the roof and back, and black plastic on the wheels. This is the only toy in the line where the molded wheels are the real wheels. The front wheels even share an axle running through the toy, but the rear wheels at least spin freely. The robot head is not only visible from the back, it's poking out the back somewhat so it's visible from the side too. It looks like Ratchet's being carted off to the repair bay by a copy of himself, and he looks indignant about it. There's also the same sort of big gap in his front bumper that Bumblebee has, for the same transformation reasons. The windshield is powder blue, and there's a bit of red paint on the gray part of the roof to make it sort of match the red part of the roof. No paint on his lightbar, or on the sides at all. Transformation: Fold front down as boots, pull side panels out as arms, fold head out from the back. Robot Mode: Wow. Okay, ignoring the arms, it's merely mediocre. But the arms make it sooooo bad. The shoulder joints are halfway between head and waist, which is a bad start. And the arms that are molded onto the insides of the side panels are organic-looking. Superhero arms, complete with flareed gloves. The heck? Trogdor the Burninator territory here. The head and arm panels are soft very light gray plastic. The torso front and boots are rigid very light gray plastic. The core piece (torso back and upper legs) is bright red rigid plastic. An unpainted Autobot symbol is molded on the belly. The molded arms are painted solid red, as is a strip along the back of the helmet (the crest is unpainted, and they kinda muffed the broken crest bit). The face and fake chest windows (since the real windows end up on the feet) are painted powder blue, and the eyes are the same slightly darker robin's egg blue seen on Prime's face. There's white bits on the thighs. You can move the arms at the unnaturally low shoulders or make the head tilt back, that's it for articulation. Overall: While the vehicle mode is more functional than most, the head peering out the back is unsettling. The robot mode is just really bad, even for a dollar toy. Pass on this one unless shooting for completion. 6. LUGNUT Vehicle Mode: Bomber Note: None Vehicle Mode: Pretty close to the real thing, although his tail is more conventional instead of the power mace thing. Mostly made of dark purple plastic, with faintly metallic dull teal plastic on the bombs. There's a gap on the underside in the rear, but it's the least gappy/crappy vehicle mold of the lot. There's even molded turrets on the top and sides, making this the only toy of the set with obvious weapons. 4.5" (11cm) long with a wingspan of 4.75" (12cm). There's paint on the tail and wingtips that matches the bomb plastic pretty well, although I don't care for the color in general. There's yellow bands on the bombs (but no black hazard stripes, although the stripes are molded), and the Decepticon symbol molded behind the cockpit is actually painted gold, the only painted faction symbol of the set. Yeah, Lugnut stands out in a lot of ways. Transformation: Fold the front section with wings down to reveal the head (this snaps into place), fold the rear section down as feet (it also snaps into place), flip the bombs down as arms. Robot Mode: Ironically, too tall to be accurate, at 4.25" (11cm) tall. he actually looks like some sort of robed priest, with his "feet" being a joined fuselage piece. You can make him shorter by leaving the legs bent 90 degrees and calling the lower legs big feet, though. The head is metallic dull teal plastic with a painted red optic, everything else is as in vehicle mode. The "arms" bend at the shoulders, but since the bombs don't open up or anything it's not too impressive. All in all, it's a nice robot mode, but doesn't really look like Lugnut. It's more like Lugnut's skinny brother who became a bishop...which suggests fan character to me. :) Overall: I wish the colors matched the show or Voyager toy a bit better, their blue choice is pretty weak. And the robot mode doesn't look very Lugnutty, but it's decent on its own. If you only get one McTFA toy, this is the one to seek out. Dave Van Domelen, thinking "Hightail" for Lugnut's bishop brother....