Dave's Transformers Rant: Sideways with Crosswise and Rook Smokescreen with Liftor Snagged these at K-Mart, only ones on the shelf, just ahead of the whole dockyard crisis. Packaging is essentially the same as that on the first trio of Supercons, down to the first wave comic. Sideways has his own split symbol, half Autobot and half Decepticon. Each had three twist-ties (2 on Smokescreen, 1 each on Liftor, Sideways, Rook and Crosswise) and no rubber bands. CAPSULES Sideways: Good vehicle mode, okay transformation, iffy robot mode, okay gimmicks. Mini-Cons nifty. Mildly recommended. $9.99 at K-Mart. Smokescrean: Good vehicle mode, good transformation, okay robot mode and gimmicks. Liftor is a tiny god. Recommended. $9.99 at K-Mart. RANTS AUTOBOT/DECEPTICON: SIDEWAYS Altmode: Motorcycle Function: Spy Quote: "Efficiency through self-sufficiency." SIDEWAYS is a conscientious, ninja-like warrior who races to battle. Disguised as a sports bike he exceeds speeds of 250mph. Mysterious and silent, he reveals little about himself except a fierce drive to confront the enemy and quickly return to CYBERTRON. On Earth, he undergoes a personality change that gives him both a good and a bad side based on Mini-con influence. This split makes him highly unpredictable. It's hard to predict which half of his split personality will win in the end - the good side or the evil side! STR 4 INT 6 SPD 6 END 5 RNK 6 COUR 8 FRB 6 SKL 8 Avg 6.125 Unlike most side-changers in the past, it looks like Sideways is truly neutral until he gets under the influence of Mini-Cons, as they give him both a good side and an evil side. Innnnteresting. Vehicle Mode: 5.5" (14cm) long motorcycle that combines elements of a racer and a highway machine. The main color is a magenta-violet, with the primary accent being yellow. There's also plenty of black, dark gray and light gray, plus clear windshield and orange missile tips. Oh, and metallic blue headlights. I would recommend carefully scrutinizing the flanks of the motorcycle mode before transforming, as they don't have an obvious position when transforming back. There's no kickstand, but the flanks are wide enough to let the cycle stay mostly vertical. The handlebars are not connected to the front wheel, although the transformation joints give the front wheel a little turning room. There's two peg-holes in the seat for the Mini-Cons to plug into (not PowerLinx, just rectangular slots) for riding the cycle. The only robot kibble visible in this mode are the fists, and they're partly concealed. Two dead hardpoints on the "saddlebags" on either side of the rear wheel, although they have a bit of a problem with mold-release oil. Clean 'em off before playing, or the Mini-Con will just fall off. Two live hardpoints on either flank, connected to the missiles/exhaust pipes. The missiles really aren't good to fire in this mode, though, but I suppose they discourage pursuit. Transformation: This has a very G1 feel to it, and that's not all good. The motorcycle flanks becoming the arms requires a bit of massaging to get the panels into position. The legs are especially G1, as they pull out to lengthen, but do so in a way that makes knee joints difficult to pull off and fragile if attempted. Some weird variant forms are possible, however, although they all pretty much just look like mutated motorcycles. }-> Robot Mode: 5.25" (13cm) tall at the head, a little more for the handlebar antlers. Same basic color scheme, but more of the dark gray is visible. In default mode, there is no faction symbol visible on the light gray area behind the clear windshield on the chest. Not a whole lot of poseability. The shoulders swivel, and the elbows swivel along the long axis (in other words, arms are always straight out, but the forearms can be rotated for better-looking firing position). The hips are ratcheting universal joints, which is nice, and the ankles have some range of motion due to the transformation joints, but there's no knees at all. The wheels on back can be folded down as sort of a hoverpack, although the angle isn't very good for it. The fists can fold up and down thanks to thr transformation joint, and they have no peg holes. If Sideways wants to use the Star Saber, he'll have to plug it onto his forearm. In robot mode, the missile launchers are on the forearms. Attaching a Mini-Con to the hardpoint lets you push forward and fire the "marble shooter" style missiles. Each Mini-Con has a suggested weapon mode for this purpose (both look decent as bows, though). A bit cumbersome to operate, though, and the range is pretty limited. Of course, the real point of this toy's design is the Headmaster gimmick. The arms of each Mini-Con are at different separations, so each pushes down a different amount of panel-age to reveal either the Autobot or Decepticon symbol. More on them in their own entries. Rook: 2.5" (6.5cm) tall humanoid mostly in black, with dark gray arms and a light gray head, plus some red markings on the lower chest. Connector is in the lower part of the back, and I can't find a Mini-Con symbol. Crosswise also seems to lack a Mini-Con symbol, so perhaps these guys are direct partisans of the Autobots and Decepticons? Rook is reasonably poseable, mostly in the legs. He has a tab on his butt that plugs into a slot in the motorcycle mode's seat, and he can sit along with Crosswise on the bike. Both the hips and the knees are a combination of a hinge at one end and a ball joint at the other, so the legs can really wrap around Sideways's engines. Rook has a number of weaknesses, although all have reasons or can be fixed. His head is a colorless gray peg, and he could really use at least paint on the eyeslit, even if paint elsewhere would be scraped off by transformation. Annoyingly, while peglike, the head is just a bit too large to be held in the hands of a figure that can hold the Star Saber. Next, the arms are stubby and only have swivel (well, very restricted ball joint) joints. But this is necessary to let them push down the panels for Sideways's faction revelation. Then, the stance is freakishly wide. However, if you're willing to give up a little poseability for a good standing look, the hip joints have plenty of play and you can get the thighs around so they're directly under the torso. And finally, the torso is a weird block shape...but this is because he turns into a head. As a head, Rook is a fairly standard helmet shape, if a bit upside-down looking. A small panel slides up to reveal painted and molded red eyes. If you go by the instructions, Rook-head has his own set of antlers to continue the look and feel of Sideways's own head. You can also fold the legs away in the back a bit if you think Cerunnos-like antlers are doofy. (Aside: I gotta wonder if the designers had Cerunnos and his Wild Hunt in mind? A motorcycle would be an appropriate update of the wolfpack concept.) Anyway, the head plugs into a slot in the top of the regular head, which retracts back into the chest for this purpose unless you're looking for a real Freakyboy Bi-Beast sort of appearance. This won't reveal the symbol, but it does make it look like Sideways is wearing a very bizarre hat. The patterning of the helmet is much like a stylized ninja mask. Additionally, Rook becomes the upper half of the combined rider robot, which is not named in the instructions. After some thought, I have decided to call the rider Crosscheck. More on Crosscheck later. Crosswise: Mostly light gray with some dark gray nad black, plus orange/red detailing, this humanoid Mini-Con stands 2.5" (6cm) tall, a little shorter than Rook. Connector is on the upper back, and the head is an unpainted peg like Rook's. His hips are right under his armpits, but the torso panel (which can fold up) conceals this fact slightly. The hips are only ball joints, rather than the double jointing seen on Rook, but the knees have the same ball and hinge combo as on Rook. Crosswise is generally not as good as Rook. In head mode, Crosswise also has the sliding panel to reveal the eyes, and has an asian warrior look (not really sure if it's more ninja or bushi, though). Since Crosswise's arms are on pinned swivels rather than ball joints with a tiny bit of give, it plugs in a little more easily. Crosswise becomes the lower body of Crosscheck by turning the lower legs around, flipping the torso cover (most of the helmet face) up 180 degrees, and moving the arms out of the way. You can also make a freaky big-head robot from this mode by not getting the arms out of the way and sliding up the panel covering the helmet's eyes. Crosscheck: The instructions just call this the "larger rider" with no name. Many names have been suggested: Nightbird, Nightracer, Mindset (after the fact that Rook and Mindset were both G2 Decepticons in the comic), Black Racer and Axer. I decided I like Crosscheck instead. This bad boy is just over 3" (8cm) tall, with extremely poseable arms and legs. The color is mostly black with light gray head and lower legs, dark gray pelvis, and orange/red accents on the chest and shins. The hands have curved recesses which wrap very well around the handlebars of Sideways in bike mode, and the legs fit so well around the cycle that you don't even need the butt-peg. Crosscheck has connectors behind his head and, um, on his pelvis. But it's not as bad as on Dualor, more like a belt buckle. About the only flaws Crosscheck has are a lack of paint on the head and the fact that his two parts come apart a little too easily. A tighter tolerance on the way Crosswise's chest locks onto Rook's back would have helped. Well, okay, the feet could be bigger, he's kinda top-heavy for when he's not riding the cycle. He can stand pretty well, but not in a dynamic pose. Overall: Okay, lots of flaws to complain about. But enough nifty aspects to being it into positive territory overall. And if you have that touch of nostalgia, the retro ideas of Headmasters and doublespies may make this a worthwhile purchase for you. AUTOBOT: SMOKESCREEN Altmode: Crane truck Function: Tactical Analysis Quote: "Strike hard, strike straight." SMOKESCREEN is a big, strong warrior that moves with slow deliberation and packs a lot of power. He makes every move count in battle. He doesn't waste time on fancy fighting styles - he plows in with all his might - fists and weapons swinging with full force. SMOKESCREEN channels all his energy and skills into the fight and tries to predict what the DECEPTICONS will do next. Can the strength and insight of SMOKESCREEN help the AUTOBOTS win the battle to claim the MINI-CONS? STR 9 INT 7 SPD 6 END 8 RNK 5 COUR 8 FRB 6 SKL 6 Avg 6.875 As usual with Armada, I'm guessing at the "Function" line based on the bio note. The reuse of the Smokescreen name also colored my judgement in that regard (yeah, original Smokescreen was more into tricking the enemy than figuring it out, but it amounts to similar duty). My guess is that if/when he shows up in the cartoon, he'll be able to fire smoke cloud missiles. Vehicle Mode: The body is 5" (13cm) long in orange and black with silver, gray and blue accents. The crane arm is just a bit longer than that when retracted, mostly gray and blue with some silver bits and an orange hardpoint and a blue hook. Headlights and Autobot symbol are painted red. There's a "dead" hardpoint on the roof of the driver's compartment, supporting the crane when it's at rest. There are three foci for gimmicks in this mode. The weakest is the panel on which the Autobot symbol is molded. It simply flips up like a hatch cover, but there is nothing under it except a hatch pattern. However, the pattern on the underside of the panel bears a strong resemblance to the pattern on Blackout's sensor dish, suggesting this is also a sensor (intended to let him predict enemy actions, and possibly see through his own smokescreens if he can make 'em). Next is the winch. 6.5" (17cm) of white nylon string connects a black winch cylinder to a blue hook. The hook is tipped with a hardpoint, although it focuses on gripping the center post of a Mini-Con connector, the outer radius is a bit smaller than a regular hardpoint's, so it won't fit firmly in the hands of figures that can hold hardpoints or the Star Saber. The hook's inner area is also too small to wrap around something else's hardpoint. The winch can be spun manually to retract it, but that's not the main gimmick. There's a blue switch which engages a gear inside the rear of the vehicle so that when the wheels roll forward the winch retracts automatically. In the other position, the wheels roll freely without affecting the winch. Finally there's the crane. Turning it causes the robot head to turn (which isn't so relevant in this mode, although it does let you create a weird-looking hybrid that drives backwards). Putting a Mini-Con on its hardpoint (or poking a twist-tie in the hole) lets you slide the crane out, and a missile launcher springs out when it reaches nearly full extension. It clicks into position, but does not lock (i.e. no Mini-Con needed to retract it). This "Long Tom" launcher is a full 10" (25cm) long, perhaps the biggest gun in Armada to date. The missile is launched by pushing a blue button in the final segment, and the missile itself is 3" (8cm) long. It fires a few feet. Unlike many missiles, it can be inserted without worrying about orientation, as the cross-section is circular rather than cross-shaped. The fact that this gun is so big and only gives a Fireblast of 6 suggests the primary munitions are tactical rather than damaging (smokescreens, concussive, etc). Transformation: Many elements are reminiscent of Hot Shot, especially the legs. It's not immediately obvious that the shoulders snap forward into place, but it looks better that way. Most things are pegged together pretty securely, which makes transformation back to vehicle mode nice and stable. Robot Mode: 5" tall at the Sharkticon-ish head, the feet are slanted slightly to allow it to stay balanced with the Big Horking Gun deployed. Some have reported difficulty in getting Smokescreen to stay standing with the gun out, but I have had no problems. It's even staying standing on my wobbly computer desk as I pound the keyboard to type this. Poseability is limited, but not G1-level bad. The hips are stiff ball joints, and there's mid-thigh swivels. No knees, but the ankles can move because of transformation joints. Not many stable poses possible, though. The shoulders are swivels, plus hinges that let the arms go up to the sides. The elbows can bend maybe ten degrees due to play in the extender slot that lets the arms lengthen out from vehicle mode. The head turns when the cannon is turned, although you can ratchet the two onto separate bearings (mine is a little off, and won't get better than a few degrees away). Hands are molded into the insides of the arm panels, but can't move or hold anything. Unlike Hot Shot, who has his hands molded fist-hole out, Smokescreen's fists are palm out. I suppose you could drill peg-holes through the side windows if you wanted, and had a big enough drill bit. All of the gimmicks available in vehicle mode work here as well, although of course you canalong to make the winch retract. Liftor: Liftor rawks. 2.75" (7cm) long in vehicle mode, mostly blue and gray with orange center and black wheels. The Mini-Con symbol is on the hood, and the connector in the center bottom. The vehicle mode is a sort of hot rodded combination of forklift and plow. The forks don't have much lift because of the sleek design, but the forks seem more of a weapon than a tool, bearing some resemblance to Megatron's antlers. The rear wheels are large and the front wheels small, making it a funny-car style of hot rod. Exhaust pipes come out the gray rear compartment. Transformation is fairly simple but elegant, and has an undocumented feature. The forks can be rotated around, to form better wings in robot mode, or even rotated to the front so that he can fork people in melee combat. Robot mode stands 2" (5cm) tall and is more black, blue and gray, the orange hidden on the back. The "wingspan" of the forks is 2.5" (6cm) and looks really nice. It's a VERY poseable Mini-Con, more poseable than Smokescreen. Shoulders are swivels, hips are higly restricted ball joints (with a little bit of side to side play), elbows and knees are hinges. And the head turns, woot. Despite the relatively small footprint of the boots, it can stand in a number of dynamic poses, and the way the arms are built lend themselves to boxing stances. Oh, and Liftor is also a member of Armada's Pirate Club, with an eyepatch. Between that and similarities between Smokescreen and Blackout, I'd almost think that Demolishor and Smokescreen swapped partners some time in the past. Overall: Smokescreen is a decent toy, with a solid vehicle mode and a fair robot mode. But Liftor is excellent in almost every way, and alone almost makes the $10 toy worth buying. Dave Van Domelen, thinks Smokescreen's quote should be "THIS IS MY BOOM STICK!" Since, y'know, it's a boom. And goes boo...oh, never mind.